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Life Story Links: Blog Roundup, February 5
Click for memoir writing advice, personal history workshops, how you can help make Holocaust victims’ records searchable online, and more life story links.
“We tell ourselves stories in order to live.”
—Joan Didion
Whose story will you tell?
SHOW-DON’T-TELL MOMENTS
We all know the old maxim: “Show, don’t tell.” But sometimes subjects don't believe that it applies to memoir: “Clients want to tell me their feelings,” says Massachusetts–based memoir ghost writer Nancy West. “And yet it's usually easy to find actions that demonstrate those feelings much better than adjectives or adverbs ever can.”
NEW YEAR
“The stories from the past help prepare us for the future. We must be ready to embrace what is coming,” writes Carol McLaren as she embarks on a year filled with changes, including a move from Virginia to Arizona, and a new website for her business, Unique Life Stories, on the horizon. Good luck, Carol!
EVERYONE GETS AN ‘A’
Life story writing workshops are safe places to share one’s story and bond with others as they do the same. Karen Bender of Leaves of Your Life in Herndon, VA, is offering in-person and online workshops for anyone interested in exploring weekly themes.
“IT HAPPENED.”
Millions of documents containing details about victims of the Holocaust and Nazi persecution during WWII still exist today. Through the World Memory Project, you can help make these victims' records searchable online & restore the identities of people the Nazis tried to erase from history, one person at a time.
First-person reads
“DO YOU WANT TO DANCE?”
Sarah White of Madison–based First Person Productions often publishes the writing of others on her blog. Deb Wilbrink answered a New Orleans-themed call for submissions with an engaging coming-of-age story about teenage firsts in the Big Easy.
PHOTOS TELL STORIES, TOO
“The Cubans encouraged exchange of words and hospitality, not discouraged by my minimal Spanish language skills,” says MA–based personal historian Leah Abrahams in her introduction to her photo essay, “Cuba on the Cusp,” on the Social Documentary Network website (“visual stories exploring global themes”).
Bonus links
- This Beginner’s Guide to Backing Up Photos is a must-read for every camera-toting memory keeper.
- Forty first-person essays that talk candidly about love and loss: “Brutally honest and inspiring, Modern Loss invites us to talk intimately and humorously about grief, helping us confront the humanity (and mortality) we all share.” I highly recommend this new book.
- My own blog contribution this week would likely fall on the “low-brow” quadrant of New York mag’s Approval Matrix, but I still submit it’s worth a read: Recapture the spirit of childhood Valentine’s Days with three unique ideas for marking the holiday with meaning—and heart.
Short Takes
#MemoriesMatter #Legacy #LifeStories #Memoir #OralHistory #FamilyHistory
Life Story Links: Blog Roundup, January 23
Our roundup explores the path to legacy, including (mis)adventures with DNA, community memoirs, family history through storytelling & a new Ann Curry TV series.
“Is that the secret meaning of the word ‘story,’ do you think: a storing place of memories?”
—J.M. Coetzee, Foe
Stories are at the heart of what we do. As personal historians, we work across an array of media, from coffee table books and audio recordings to full-fledged video biographies and printed memoirs. No matter the medium, though (and no matter what we call our work), the preservation of stories is key. Oh yes, and story sharing—did I mention the sharing...?!
The Path to Legacy
SENIOR CENTER STORIES
“In 2012, I completed my first community memoir, a compilation with 47 senior citizens from Carleton-Willard Village in Bedford, MA,” says Nancy West of Nancy Shohet West Editorial & Memoir Services. Five years later she was invited back to do a second volume, which launched this week.
200 YEARS OF MEMORIES
How deep is your memory bank? “We often despair when an elderly person passes away, their memories unrecorded,” writes Pam Pacelli Cooper of Massachusetts–based Verissima Productions. “What we often forget to do is seek out the younger person who listened to the stories of their elders. We can record them.”
A TENDENCY TOWARD NOSTALGIA
Rediscovering an old family photo album in my closet prompted me to reflect on the lasting appeal and transformative power of nostalgia.
(MIS)ADVENTURES WITH DNA
“Sometimes your heritage doesn’t have anything at all to do with your genetics—and I didn’t even have to spit in a test tube to figure it out,” writes Kristen V. Brown is this compelling piece that unravels the science behind ancestry DNA tests—and that, certainly, makes us wonder if those colorful pie-chart genetic results reveal something profound about what makes you, you...or if they are simply a fun conversation starter.
Must-See TV
“THROUGH THE EYES OF ORDINARY PEOPLE”
In her new PBS series We’ll Meet Again, veteran journalist Ann Curry focuses on reunions between people whose lives intersected and were torn apart at pivotal moments. The seasoned interviewer honors the power of connection, and the stories she draws forth from her subjects are emotional and, perhaps more important, seem to inspire viewers to reflect on their own lives and moments of connection. View the official trailer and get a peek at upcoming episodes here. The first episode airs tonight.
Short Takes
#MemoriesMatter #Legacy #LifeStories #Memoir #OralHistory #FamilyHistory
Life Story Links: Blog Roundup, January 9
The (unexpected?) audience for your memoir, the wisdom of old people & remembrance of those lost in 2017 round out this week’s life story links blog roundup.
“What I know for sure is that speaking your truth is the most powerful tool we all have.”
—Oprah Winfrey, Golden Globes, 2018
It has been a slow start to the new year for me, hit with a flu that has left me grumpy and tired and well, not at all productive. I’ve had plenty of time to read, though, and since my guilty-pleasure Christmas gift, Tina Brown’s Vanity Fair Diaries (so much dish I recognize from my years in the same mag world!) is too heavy to hold up in my weakened state, I’ve been indulging in memoirs on the Kindle and plenty of link diving on my phone.
I’m almost done with Alan Cumming’s 2014 memoir Not My Father’s Son (well worth the read). I’ve got the current issue of Brevity open on my phone, for creative nonfiction pieces that fulfill and enlighten in short periods of time. And I’ve been perusing Cathi Nelson’s new book, Photo Organizing Made Easy: Going from Overwhelmed to Overjoyed, gleaning tips to share in a future blog post (as I’ve written about before, photographs can make for incredible memory prompts, and being able to find the photos in our overflowing photo libraries is often no easy task).
Here are a few posts and articles that have been on my sick-bed reading list, as well. Happy (and healthy!) New Year to you all, fellow storytellers.
Living, Writing, Remembering
WHY WE READ ABOUT ONE ANOTHER
“My memoir clients assume their readership will be limited to their children and grandchildren,” says Massachusetts-based personal historian Nancy Shohet West. “They are consistently surprised when their nieces, nephews, friends, neighbors, former colleagues, and long-time acquaintances all start clamoring for copies of their own.” If you can picture just one reader, it might be time to start writing.
CLASS NOTES
Craig Siulinski of Sharing Legacies in San Carlos, CA, recently completed leading his first Life Story Writing class based on the principles of guided autobiography. Read about his joyful experience, learn more about guided autobiography, or pick up a book to help you on your path to crafting your own life story. And if you’re in the market for a flash nonfiction writing class, check out Sarah White’s recent post.
REMEMBERING THOSE LOST IN 2017
As part of the New York Times Magazine’s annual The Lives They Lived issue, editors invited readers to contribute a photograph and a story of someone close to them who died this year: The Lives They Loved.
“TALKING TO ALL THOSE OLD PEOPLE”
“No work I have ever done has brought me as much joy and hope, or changed my outlook on life as profoundly,” writes John Leland of his year interviewing elderly New Yorkers. His book Happiness Is a Choice You Make: Lessons From a Year Among the Oldest Old will be published on Jan. 23. A. E. Hotchner reviewed: “Remarkable revelations gleaned from those who, in their superannuated years, have discovered rewarding benefits from the life that actually surrounds them.”
CELEBRATING LIFE, AND ART
A film called “funny and life-affirming,” Faces Places explores themes of art, vision, regular people, and aging, all with tenderness and wit, energy and delight. Find showtimes in select cities.
Short Takes
#MemoriesMatter #Legacy #LifeStories #Memoir #OralHistory #FamilyHistory
Life Story Links: Blog Roundup, December 11
Oral history during the holidays, how not to conduct an interview, power of voice to evoke memories & a few first person accounts to whet your life story whistle.
“We tell ourselves stories in order to live.”
—Joan Didion
With so many diverse links of interest to storytellers and family historians this week, why don’t we skip introductions and dive right in—shall we?
Listen Up
(JUST) AUDIO?
Meghan Vigeant of Stories To Tell in Maine is making a change to her personal history business: She’s paring away the multitude of offerings she once listed, including book production and memoir coaching, and is now focusing on her audio services: audio memoirs & oral histories. Read why this time, it’s all about the audio.
FROM PHONE MESSAGES TO FAMILY STORIES
“When I was a kid spending the night at my grandmother’s house in Harrisville, Michigan, I’d stay up past my bedtime and lay on the bedroom floor with an ear pressed against the heat grate, straining to hear the conversations of the adults in the parlor below,” says Rebekah Smith. She was “seeking out good company and soaking up their stories” then, something she continues to do now in her QuOTed podcast. Check out the 30 mini episodes the Minneapolis-based Smith posted as part of National Podcast Post Month in November 2017.
Signs of the Times
THE FAMILY TABLE
“Occasionally, I would come home from work and find a strange, unshaven man dressed in rags, sitting at our kitchen table,” Ellie Kahn's grandmother told her. Ellie learned of her great-grandmother’s Depression-era generosity (serving strangers entire meals in her home, “from soup to dessert”) while the family shared stories around the Chanukah table. There is no better time to tell such precious stories than during the holidays, and Ellie Kahn, a Los Angeles-based oral historian and owner of Living Legacies Family Histories, offers up myriad suggestions for starting new storytelling traditions this year.
HOW NOT TO CONDUCT AN INTERVIEW
“Those of us who interview others for a living can learn a lot from [Matt] Lauer’s disastrous outing,” writes NYC personal historian Samantha Shubert, who goes on to detail four strategic & substantive ways to get the most out of any conversational interview—not à la the former Today Show host’s example.
Visual Storytelling
When a photographer sets out to live with and document the everyday lives of an order of contemplative nuns in New Zealand, the silent observance reveals a rich narrative.
A photograph by Cam McLaren on display at the New Zealand Geographic Photographer of the Year exhibition
First Person Reflections
ON CARS...
After reading Sarah White’s recent post about her first car (“The Pinto”), guest writer Dorothy Ross submitted a tale of her own youthful automotive daring to True Stories Well Told. (“I named my sweet car Daisy, after the girl in The Great Gatsby,” reflects Ross.) Consider adding your voice to the reminiscences about first cars on Madison, WI-based Sarah White’s blog.
...AND MORE...
- Carol McLaren of Unique Life Stories in Pinon, Arizona writes about her father on the occasion of his 91st birthday.
- Hear, Here is an oral history project in LaCrosse, Wisconsin, that focuses on place-based stories that bring the experiences of the everyday person to light.
Little #LifeStory Links
#MemoriesMatter #Legacy #LifeStories #Memoir #OralHistory #FamilyHistory
Life Story Links: Blog Roundup, November 28
A whole lotta links about preserving life stories, from dealing with family stories that are painful to why preserving your own memories is urgent.
“If a story is in you, it has to come out.”
—William Faulkner
Time Is of the Essence
BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE
In the process of saving family histories, procrastination not only steals time, it steals stories from future generations. A cautionary tale with a true sense of urgency this holiday season from Pam Pacelli-Cooper of Cambridge-based Verissima Productions.
“SOMEDAY” IS TODAY
Meet Josh: He plans to write his biography someday. Yet he has told his adult kids none of his life stories. How about you—are you waiting for “someday,” too?
When Family Stories Are Painful
FAMILY HISTORY & SHAME
Growing up, Julie Lindahl felt an indescribable guilt, a feeling she could never understand. Once she discovered that her grandfather had been a brutal SS officer during World War II, she decided to devote her life to digging into the truth. Unlocking the secrets of her family showed Julie the worst, and then the best, of humankind.
“Shame, you can’t contribute anything, but responsibility, you can do a lot with,” she says. “It’s a challenging story, but one that gives me a great deal of hope…”
Lindahl is the founder of Stories for Society, a nonprofit that works with storytelling for learning and communication. Her memoir, The Pendulum, will be published in September 2018, and is currently available to educators in a shorter version.
THE PERSPECTIVE OF YEARS
“Considering that my parents were children of The Great Depression and I was of the much more prosperous post–World War II generation, it was, perhaps, inevitable that we wouldn’t always see things eye to eye,” writes Des Moines-based personal historian Larry Lehrer. “Of course, I lost most clashes with Dad, many of them ending with ‘because I say so.’” Lehrer remembers his dad with a new perspective on the 97th anniversary of his birth.
Books & Beyond
MAKING WORDS WORK
Memoir writers in need of an editor will be interested in Sarah Sally Hamer’s primer on the different types of editing that shape a book. In this installment, the Louisiana-based writing teacher talks about line editing—“where, finally, you make it pretty.”
A LIFE WORTH REMEMBERING
“Honoring a life well-lived doesn’t just benefit the younger generations—it empowers the elders themselves, and in the process, assigns meaning to their life and permanence to their story.” Forbes highlights The Role of Family Historians in Preserving Wealth by Defining a Legacy.
Little #LifeStory Links
#MemoriesMatter #Legacy #LifeStories #Memoir #OralHistory #FamilyHistory
Life Story Links: Blog Roundup, November 14
May these links inspire you to make family storytelling a regular part of everyday life, not just something done during holidays like Thanksgiving & Christmas.
“Thanksgiving, after all, is a word of action.”
—W.J. Cameron
Storytelling abounds during the holidays. That which all personal historians strive for on a daily basis—memory preservation, communal story sharing, meaningful (and fun!) reminiscence—often comes to the forefront for families during the holiday season.
What better time to tell stories than around the Thanksgiving table? What better opportunity to ask questions of family elders than when generations are gathered together in one place?
It is my sincere hope that everyone takes advantage of these opportunities for story sharing—and that, once the turkey leftovers are eaten and the December decorations are stored away, those feelings of gratitude and recognition that come with reminiscence linger indefinitely, urging you to make story sharing a regular part of your everyday lives.
Veterans Day
Communities big and small across the nation gathered this past weekend to honor our military veterans. When I was a kid, Veterans Day meant parades and plastic poppies. As a parent, I strive to expose my son to individuals who served our country, giving him an opportunity to hear stories firsthand. Last year, we toured the Battleship New Jersey and spoke to WWII Veterans. This year, we traveled to Philadelphia, engaging with numerous Veterans in heartwarming conversations at the Independence Seaport Museum. Did you bear witness to a Vet’s story?
EXPLORE VETERANS’ STORIES
The Veterans Legacy Program aims to memorialize Veterans by telling the stories of those buried in VA national cemeteries, ensuring their stories live on beyond their final resting place.
BEYOND THE HOLIDAY
While Veterans Day has passed, remember that any day is a good day to ask a Vet questions—and to listen.
“As a Vietnam Vet, I find it easier to share war stories with fellow Vets than with non-Vets,” writes Tom Cormier, cofounder of Legacy Stories. “But there's a lot more to military life than the worst of the worst... There are lots of fascinating stories to be told about other aspects of military life. In fact, most Veterans would be happy to share their military stories about coming of age, buddies for life, humorous situations, exotic cultures, travels, and more. All they need (and want) is for someone to ask. Problem is, most people don't know how.” Thank you, Tom, for helping us discover how with these 10 thoughtful conversation starters.
Thanksgiving
THE GREAT THANKSGIVING LISTEN
Truly listening to someone reminds them that their life matters. StoryCorps leads the way in creating a culture of listening that echoes across the nation, encouraging everyone—especially young people—to interview elders during Thanksgiving gatherings. Their goal: to create an oral history of the contemporary United States, one interview at a time.
Interviews recorded on the StoryCorps App become part of the StoryCorps Archive at the American Folklife Center at the Library of Congress. The Great Thanksgiving Listen is now in its third year, providing families with a priceless piece of personal history.
FAMILY MEMOIR OPPORTUNITY?
Maybe you think you’ve heard all your family’s stories. But ask yourself this, suggests Nancy West, who provides memoir services in Carlisle, Massachusetts: “Could you retell the details of their stories to your own children or grandchildren? Could you explain the connections, nail the chronology, put the pieces together so that it made sense even when told secondhand?” If not, the holidays may be the time to embark on capturing stories for your family memoir.
More Holiday Reads
- Soldiers Are More than Just Symbols: David Abrams on seeing the individuality of veterans [LitHub]
- This Year, Pass the Turkey AND the Family Photos [SF Gate]
Any Old Day of the Week
Our photos tell the stories of our lives—and our lives, frankly, are not merely birthdays & weddings. Our lives are lived in the in-between. Are you capturing those moments for the next generation?
What Are You Reading?
I’m generally reading many books at once—one nonfiction book (always learning!), one cheesy romance (I’ve got to escape once in a while!), one literary work (often a classic I somehow skipped as an English major), one impulse check-out from my local library…and always, these days, at least one memoir.
Currently I am finishing up Leonardo DaVinci by Walter Isaacson, with Amy Tan’s latest, Where the Past Begins: A Writer’s Memoir, up next. What first-person writing inspires you?
#MemoriesMatter #Legacy #LifeStories #Memoir #OralHistory #FamilyHistory
Life Story Links: Blog Roundup, October 24
Finding the universal in the particular, owning the truth, & why we must tell our life stories: roundup of links for memory-keepers, writers & preservationists.
“In the particular is contained the universal.”
—James Joyce
It’s been a while since I rounded up the stories I’ve been reading to share here—but after a few weeks where I focused on my own writing (at a fabulous retreat with Dani Shapiro in the Berkshires) and my own business (exciting changes coming soon!), I’m back to it.
You may have noticed the new header and photo above; what do you think?
I try to include a wide array of links here, of interest to oral historians, bookmakers, videographers, memoirists, and those with just an inkling of wanting to share their own stories. I never want what we call ourselves to be alienating, nor confusing. I do believe we all have a passion for life stories and legacy, though...so hopefully the name change will be a welcome one. If you’ve got other ideas, please do share!
Our Stories, Our Selves
WHO’S ASKING THE QUESTIONS?
“To be an oral historian is to be a student of life.” As Meghan Vigeant of Stories To Tell in Maine aimed to teach a class of budding oral historians, she soon rediscovered that sometimes, the teacher becomes the student.
TIPS FOR LEGACY KEEPERS
Four ways to make your role as the unofficial family historian easier—and more meaningful, a guest post on The Photo Organizers blog.
IMPERFECT MEMORIES & FAMILY STORIES
“As you preserve your memories, take the time to bask in them. Remember the sensory settings of stories—the sounds, smells, and feel. Remember the associated emotions. Most importantly, enjoy yourself as you share them,” writes Michigan-based author Laura Hedgecock in this post on the fallibility of memory—and why that shouldn’t stop you from writing your life stories.
“DOES MY STORY EVEN MATTER?”
“The smallest moments of average individuals have more depth of meaning that any documentary on a celebrity or political leader imaginable,” writes Devon Noel Lee of Pennsylvania-based America’s Footprints.
Writing Down the Bones
OWNING THE TRUTH
“For writers of memoir, the thin line between fact and fiction must not be crossed, but we face the demands of reducing complex events to comprehensible stories,” says Sarah White of Madison, WI–based First Person Productions. See how an honest, informative disclaimer may inspire compassionate readers.
ONE STORY AT A TIME
“No one will tell your stories but you. And you must: Tell them, and preserve them.” Five ideas for preserving one chapter of your life story, my own most recent post.
WRITING PERSONAL ESSAYS WITH HELP FROM THE NEW YORK TIMES
This piece is a year old, but it is brimming with quality advice, glorious writing, and links and links and links that lead you to even more inspiring personal stories, writing prompts, and fruitful ideas.
AMY TAN ON MEMOIR
“...just as memories can inspire a story, writing can also trigger memories.” Amy Tan revisits the roots of her writing career in her memoir Where The Past Begins.
Finding the Universal in the Particular
- For Decades, One Family’s Vietnam War Pain Lay Hidden Behind a Wall
[Washington Post]
- Photographer Ernesto Bazan’s new book, Before You Grow Up, is a family album in which elegant photographs are mixed with drawings, letters, his mother’s journal entries, memorabilia and notebook pages. “I made this book as a legacy for my sons, a visual testament that they can carry with them, and share with the people that they love,” he said, “and always love each other as my wife and I have been teaching them to do.”
[New York Times]
- Celebrating the History of Jews in America: Created by the National Museum of American Jewish History, Re:collection is a new—free—digital platform for preserving and sharing family stories that illustrate Jewish life in America.
Podcast Scene
RESEARCHING WITH GENEALOGY & ARCHAEOLOGY
In the latest episode of her Life Preservers podcast, Pam Pacelli Cooper of Massachusetts-based Verissima Productions explores how you reconstruct a full picture of a person using archaeology and genealogy research—using the unexpected example of prostitutes in 19th century Boston.
GENEALOGY VS. FAMILY HISTORY STORIES
In this most recent episode of The Legacy Café, host Robb Lucy converses with the president of the Southern California Chapter of the Association of Professional Genealogists about tying your family history to your family legacy. Where should one start: with the leaves on their family tree, or with the family stories passed down through generations?
WHY BIOGRAPHY?
I’m currently in the middle of reading Walter Isaacson’s Leonardo Da Vinci, the former Time magazine chief’s most recent bio (others include Steve Jobs; Einstein: His Life and Universe; Benjamin Franklin: An American Life; and Kissinger: A Biography). In an in-depth interview with Tim Ferriss, Isaacson delves into his writing process, lessons he has learned from his subjects, and so much more. “I like writing biography because it connects us with people,” he says. “The narrative of a human life is particularly exciting.”
Quick Takes
This Week in Personal History... September 13
From safeguarding family photos against natural disasters to remembering 9/11, a roundup of links of interest to memory-keepers & life story preservationists.
“So much of our future lies in preserving our past.”
—Peter Westbrook
Hurricanes Irma and Harvey have impacted far too many, in far too dire ways. While saving family photos may seem like a small thing in the wake of losing a home, those sentimental tokens of memory are often among the lost items most bemoaned. Personal historians may work to record the stories of those impacted by such natural disasters, and may also offer assistance or guidance on how to preserve your legacy for the future, however the winds may blow.
Guarding Your Legacy Against Natural Disaster
Natural disasters such as those that have befallen Texas and Florida will often “rob us of our material connections to our past,” as Des Moines–based personal historian Larry Lehmer laments.
From quilts and family photos, it is often telling to see what people save.
Storykeeping’s Clinton Haby outlines a single process that will have your legacy covered regardless of a hurricane, earthquake, fire, or flood.
Other news outlets provide advice for saving items damaged by water, including straightforward videos for DIY heirloom recovery and how to salvage photos and videos ruined by flood.
Remembering 9/11
WHOSE STORY TO TELL?
“As a New Yorker who knew people who experienced so much worse, it never really felt like a story that was mine to tell,” Ilana Wiles says of why she never wrote about 9/11 (until now). Having witnessed the towers falling from my Brooklyn window that day, I can deeply relate. But even as the years pass, we find comfort in hearing from people who were there—sharing the experience of this unimaginable moment in history—and finding meaningful ways to remember, and to bear witness.
WRITING THEIR OWN STORIES
“If how we remember is a process that never stops evolving, so too is how the children of 9/11 inspire.”
Help Delaney Colaio as she seeks to rally empowerment and recovery by allowing the children who lost parents on 9/11 to become the narrators of their own lives, telling their stories, their way, in the documentary film We Go Higher.
Telling Life Stories
It’s never been easier, according to AARP—telling the story of your life, that is. Personal historians from around the country offer their tips to retirees on how to preserve their legacy for kids and grandkids in a book, video, or digital archive.