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The best sentimental gifts for any occasion—at any price
Dawn Roode has hand-picked 18 memory-keeping gifts to celebrate your loved ones on any occasion. Whether you splurge or save, give them something to treasure.
While milestone birthdays and anniversaries are popular times to gift personal history services and tribute books, I’m all about “just because” gifts for those we love. I see (far too often) folks who wait too long to gather stories from a family elder, so don’t wait until their next “big” occasion—consider presenting them with a gift you think they’ll love just because you love them.
Below I’ve gathered some of my favorite memory-keeping gifts. Yes, a few of them are available through my business, Modern Heirloom Books, but most are from makers and vendors I respect (and support myself). I just know you’ll find something to cherish.
(Side note: Consider gifting yourself one of these items the next time you get a generic gift card…you’re here for a reason 😉)
Here’s what’s on our gift list—click which you’re interested in to go right to it (there are options at varying price points for each!):
Heirloom keepsake trunk
A trunk designed specifically for storing keepsakes is a unique gift for anyone, but especially a new parent or newlywed couple. Opt for a small one for keeping items such as trinkets, baby jewelry, postcards, pressed flowers, tickets, and the like; or go grand with a full-size trunk that will allow for larger nostalgic items including bridal adornments, baby loveys, framed photographs, and memory books.
splurge:
Petite Keep’s heirloom-quality keepsake trunks are beautifully detailed and customized with embroidered fabric linings. The handcrafted items are both functional and sweet, making for a gift destined to be treasured for generations. Trunks currently range in price from $225 up to $760 for a three-trunk bundle.
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There are plenty of trunks available for between $50 to $300 that can be tailored to your needs: Add silk linings to these decorative nesting wood boxes, for instance, or include an engraved heart-shaped lock with these larger pastel-colored metal trunks that look like treasures already.
diy:
Whether you are an avid antique shopper, a decoupage doyen, or a woodworking whiz, there are things you can do to turn a regular old box into a special memory-keeping gift: Add a personalized touch with a hand-lettered dedication, a vintage heart-shaped lock, a handmade blanket to line the trunk’s interior, or some other truly personal detail. And make sure to share the intention behind your gift in your card or gift tag, letting them know it’s a place to keep memories safe!
Blank writing journal
Whether your gift recipient is a longtime daily diarist or wants to carry a notebook as an idea receptacle for their memoir, you can never go wrong with a blank journal that suits their aesthetic.
splurge:
Okay, I admit: I covet one of these for myself! The craftsperson behind Iona Handcrafted Books, a small bookbinding studio in Seattle, uses centuries-old techniques, traditional Italian design, and the finest archival, acid-free papers to create gloriously exquisite journals “to fuel your heart with inspiration.” The unique hardware on many of the books is a hallmark. Prices currently range from $110 to $820. (I have a very similar, small leather book I purchased from an artisan in Florence, Italy, that I use as a commonplace book, and I must tell you: Writing in it feels like a sacred act.)
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Our own “Write Your Life” notebook is a dedicated space for your personal writing. Whether you use this notebook as an everyday journal or as a place to draft your memoir, you’ll love the compact design and sewn binding (it lays flat for easy writing!). The product features 80 lined, cream-colored pages, a built-in elastic closure, and a matching ribbon page marker. Plus, the expandable inner pocket is perfect for storing loose notes, so you’ll always have inspiration at your fingertips. If you prefer a notebook for jotting down ideas willy-nilly, check out our blue journal with a fun cover design, too.
DIY:
Prefer to hand-make something for your gift recipient and infuse it with your love? There are tons of how-to videos online, from the utterly simple to the more artistic; and you may be able to find classes at your local adult education spot or library. If you are in New York City, The Center for Book Arts often has bookbinding and even paper making among their class offerings.
Stories of their stuff
The heirloom trunk idea above allows for the physical gathering of heirlooms—but what about the stories behind those heirlooms? I would argue it’s the stories that will resonate with future generations even more than the stuff, so empowering your gift recipient to easily and intentionally preserve the meaning of their heirloom collections is about as thoughtful a gift as you can give!
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What could be more splurge-worthy than a custom photograph commissioned from Shana Novak, aka The Heirloomist? I can vouch for her talent (she photographed an entire media library for an early client) as well as her dedication to personal storytelling. She’ll deliver white-glove service from start to finish, ensuring your loved one’s precious heirloom is handled with care. Check out her Instagram feed for some ideas of what types of heirlooms she photographs (everything from a single matchbook to a collection of basketball jerseys), or gift a copy of her recent book, The Heirloomist: 100 Treasures and the Stories They Tell, along with a promise of her services (starting at $750), for guaranteed inspiration!
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Even the most reluctant family historian won’t be able to resist recording the stories of their treasures with this stunning stationery kit from Hannah Bergen Heirlooms. The hinged case opens to reveal everything they’ll need to preserve their heirloom stories, including tags for labeling their artwork and heirlooms, archival-quality glassine pouches, a “book of provenance” with perforated pages, and a vellum cover page with helpful hints. At the time of this writing, kit costs $120.
DIY
Check out this guide that walks you through how to capture the stories behind your family heirlooms, from creating an inventory of items to recording their provenance, from photographing them to generating a catalog for easy reference. Not only will the article give you ideas for helping your loved one walk through a project, but it may also inspire you to do the same!
Family history storytelling
For the genealogy buff in your circle, consider supporting their hobby with one of these options to help them unearth ancestors, find their stories, and organize all that research!
Splurge
Get them a gift certificate to a professional genealogist to research their family tree; ask the genealogist to help “find the stories” and put an emphasis on going deep where they can through newspapers, land records, and other documents that add context and engaging narrative to the names and dates on the tree. Find a qualified pro at the Association of Professional Genealogists (some specialize in a certain geographic region, family line specialty, or complex research areas like adoption or military records, so choose wisely). You are probably looking at an investment of $500 and up.
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Family Tree Notebooks makes organizing family history a lot easier with handsomely designed digital worksheets to download, customize, and print—so if you want to help your gift recipient get their ancestry research organized and build family history books in an approachable way, this is a great option. Consider their starter pack (currently about $80), or select individual pages if you know your loved one’s needs. (There are even templates in Polish.)
diy
Maybe you’ve interviewed your parents or just know in your heart what a connecting endeavor that would be: If you’d like to encourage your gift recipient to interview one of THEIR loved ones (maybe even you?!), download and print one of our guides to present to them: There’s the reliable standby, 56 Essential Family History Questions (free), or The Kid Kit: All You Need to Interview Your Grandparents ($5). Wrap it up with some other nostalgic items such as a framed old photo or a handmade scrapbook, and you’re golden.
Family cookbook & recipe preservation
Is food your gift recipient’s love language? Here are some delicious options to help them preserve and pass on their cherished food traditions.
Splurge
Consider giving them a custom cookbook from award-winning photographer Sarah Yeoman, founder of Savor Custom Cookbooks (she’s based in Portland, Washington, but travels for sessions): She’ll guide them on the path to preserving their cherished recipes and conduct a professional lifestyle shoot right in their home kitchen. Packages start at $3,500. (Want to make the gift even MORE special? Consider hiring a personal historian—inquire here—to add a storytelling component to your book; Sarah and I are happy to work together to create their dream cookbook!)
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A recipe journal is a great way to ensure all those handwritten recipes are kept in one place. I love the selection from Papier, which includes hardcover books with retro, modern, and personalized covers as well as more casual spiral-bound recipe books. Prices range from $32 to $40, so you can gift each member of your family with a soon-to-be-complete cookbook in whatever style suits them.
Diy
Print our free guide Preserving Your Food Memories (in addition to tips for how to get started gathering recipes and images for their food heritage project, it includes 38 food-themed family history questions to use as conversation starters or writing prompts), and box it up with some tasty treats for a gift they will savor. Find even more help in Sarah Yeoman’s free guide that’s also packed with tips on how to document your family food traditions.
Memoir help
Perhaps your gift recipient is famed within your family for regaling the group with story upon story at gatherings. Or maybe they’re the quiet type who you just know has a font of wisdom and experiences they’d be willing to share, if only asked. Either way, inviting someone’s stories is one of the best gifts you can give—I promise. No need for a milestone birthday or other special occasion: This is a gift worthy of giving “just because” ❤️
splurge
How about a professional personal historian to guide them on their storytelling or memoir journey? As my grandfather used to say, “If I had a nickel for every time” an interview subject told me that being given an opportunity to share their stories was the best gift they had ever received, “I would be rich.” When I am interviewing a personal history client, I am a curious and captivated audience. Our time is uninterrupted. They are the star. The space I hold for them is sacred. Wouldn’t you like to bestow THAT gift on your loved one? All projects are custom, but Modern Heirloom Books derived from one-on-one interviews start at $2,000; typical projects are closer to $20,000. Set up a free consultation to explore the possibilities.
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If a personal history project is out of reach, our Write Your Life annual subscription may be just the ticket. Recipients should be motivated writers (read this piece for who the gift is NOT right for!): Each week they will receive an email with a printable page of memory and writing prompts, supportive tips, and a dose of inspiration. At the end of the year, they’ll have a book’s worth of stories they have written themselves, plus guidance on how to edit and turn their narrative into something even more special. Priced at just $132, it’s a gift that says, “I appreciate you” ❤️
Diy
For those who may not have yet considered writing about their life—but who you know in your heart it would be perfect for—why not simply plant the seed? Beyond the idea that they should write their memoir, you can share links or print-outs of free guides such as How to Use Photos as Prompts for Writing Life Stories and Writing Prompts for Life Story Vignettes. Wrap them up with a journal, a nice pen, and a framed family photo for a distinct gift.
Custom wall art
The things we gather hold their share of stories, too. Here are three fun options for gifting wallhangings that turn the spotlight on your gift recipient’s collections or interests:
splurge
At Ideal Bookshelf, illustrator Jane Mount will design a fully custom art print of your (or your loved one’s) favorite books—and whose personal library doesn’t hold clues to their passions and life? Pictured is a print I bought and framed myself a number of years ago, but you can choose to order a matted and framed print as a gift, too. Prices currently range from $105 to $570.
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Help your gift recipient take a trip back to their favorite places and precious memories with a custom map-inspired wallhanging. A designer will collaborate with them and use vintage maps to help tell their story through places that represent their life’s journey. There are a variety of designs to choose from (my favorites are the Journey Map, pictured, and the Milestones Map). Prices currently range from $59 to $205.
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I rarely save (or honestly, even remember) the keepsakes given out at weddings, but one family member’s unique gift to their guests still sits on my living room bookshelf: hand-cut silhouette portraits of my husband and me. I do not know the name of the artist who created these mementos on that wedding day, but there are talented paper artists across the country. One whose work speaks to me is New York–based Elle Yi, who creates solo portraits and family silhouettes (pets, too!); prices currently range from $80 to $150.
Books
I cannot in good conscience run a company called Modern Heirloom Books and not include a few books on this gift guide! Here are two ideas worthy of wrapping up for those you love:
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Help anyone write about their life (or just enjoy a captivating read!) with Yours Truly by James R. Hagerty. In a review upon the book’s release, I wrote: “You may be surprised that a book with ‘obituary’ in the subtitle is infused with humor, but make no mistake, this is a book about honoring life in all its weird and wonderful glory—not only a great read, but a model to write your own.” (Citadel Press, 2022; list price $21.25.)
DIY
Even the most avid memory-keeping DIY-ers appreciate some guidance, and these two affordable e-books are chock-full of tips, resources, and inspiration:
Sharing Our Stories: Good Questions and Resources for Every Project by video biographer Whitney Myers (list price $12.99, currently discounted to $7.99).
The Kid Kit: Everything You Need to Interview Your Grandparents by Dawn Roode ($5).
This gift guide was originally posted on February 10, 2025; all links and prices are accurate at time of publishing.
Why I turned down an offer to publish a memory prompts journal
While a journal called “Memories from Mom” or “Grandma’s Life Story” may be brimming with good intentions, the fact is that most of them remain mostly blank.
The memory prompt journal my mother left me had more blank pages than memories. While I cherish the few pages with her handwriting and thoughts, I long for more. This entry ends with a comma—an unfulfilled promise of more to come…
A couple of years ago I was approached by a mainstream publisher to discuss authoring a journal filled with guided memory prompts for a grandparent. You know the type of book I’m talking about, right? Often beautifully printed, and stocked in the gift section at major bookstores and card shops, these types of books make for amazing impulse purchases—what better gift than the gift of telling someone you care about them enough to want to hear (and preserve!) their stories, after all?
I got fairly far in the contract process before I decided not to pursue the offer. It would have made me some money, yes. And it would have helped brand me as an expert in the memory-keeping landscape, for sure. Some of my colleagues were impressed, and my family was in favor of it as another way to boost my small business.
So why did I decide not to publish that journal that seemed so in line with my mission and values as a personal historian? Well, because I don’t fundamentally believe that they work.
Over the years I have had numerous potential clients approach me about capturing their stories in a book only after they failed to do so in other ways. Some had been given a journal filled with prompts supposedly written just for them (as a grandparent, say, or as a mother)—but they did not find the questions enticing enough to want to write answers. Others had gifted such a journal to a loved one as a gift, only to realize that the recipient was not finding (or making) the time to sit down to write.
I myself was thrilled to find two such journals on my mother’s bookshelves when I was going through her belongings after her death. I put them aside with an overwhelming sense of gratitude and anticipation—only to feel utter disappointment to find she had scrawled a few sentences in each, but nothing more. The blank pages mocked my early excitement, and I felt cheated.
Why do these books not work? In my opinion, they are filled with good intentions but they don’t always inspire action.
Often, good intentions aren’t enough. The recipient needs to be intentional about setting aside time to write, and too often, we think, I’ll get to it later. Usually, later never comes.
It can feel intimidating to write in a book that looks so precious. Of course we want a journal we are gifting to a loved one to be beautiful; I have seen gorgeously crafted journals with gold embossing on the cover and cute flourishes on the corners of each page. But the more precious they seem, the more scary it can feel to tarnish those pretty pages with our scratchy handwriting (and what if, God forbid, we need to cross something out?!). I speak from experience when I admit to having a few artisan-crafted, leather-covered blank journals in my closet that have, well, remained blank…while the cheaper notebooks I bought at a big-box store are overflowing with my writing.
Many questions simply don’t resonate. While these professionally edited and published memory prompt journals are indeed written by people who consider what questions should resonate, there is simply no one-size-fits-all memoir-in-a-box. A current client of mine whose granddaughter had gifted her a popular prompt-a-week email service told me she hasn’t answered a question in three months: “Honestly, sometimes they’re just silly. ‘How do you relax or unwind?’ Really? I’m 95. This is not what I want to be writing about,” she said. Among the skipped-over questions in my mother’s fairly blank journal were:
“What scent or sound immediately takes you back to childhood.”
“Tell me about your most memorable trip by plane, train, or ship.”
“What summer games and activities did your family enjoy?”
These questions get my memories stirring, for sure—they are not inherently bad questions. Perhaps they simply didn’t resonate for my mom on the days she sat down to write, or perhaps she just never found the time to “keep at it.” Maybe she needed a listener—someone to receive her stories, to ask follow-up questions, to hold sacred space for her to share. All of these are valid reasons I have heard from clients who abandoned their memory journals despite their best early intentions.
What do I suggest instead of a memory-prompt journal?
How to write…
To ensure that your intentions to preserve your stories turn into a series of actions that DO preserve your stories, consider finding an accountability partner. That could amount to a friend or family member with whom you commit to write about your lives—perhaps you sit down together once a week to write, then share your stories out loud (hello, deepening connections!). Or you might find accountability in working with a memoir coach or personal historian who you pay to keep you on track—there are plenty of advantages to this arrangement beyond accountability. If you’d like to see how we could work together, please reach out.
Where to write…
I recommend buying an inexpensive blank journal to record your memories. If you’d like to pass on something that feels more substantial or beautiful, you can always edit your stories and add photos later, hiring a designer to polish and print everything or going the DIY route and making a scrapbook that showcases what you’ve written. This way you never have to feel guilty about skipping one or more pages, and you can cross out and rewrite to your heart’s content (no one writes a perfect sentence the first time, I assure you!!). If you prefer, you can also just open a new document on your computer and start typing (just remember to back it up occasionally so you don’t lose your writing!)
What to write about…
To ensure that you find questions that you want to respond to—that spark your memories and inspire your writing—look for open-ended questions (you can find a year’s worth of them in my Write Your Life annual subscription, for example, or discover evocative, literary prompts in Beth Kephart’s memoir writing workbook, which I reviewed here). Want to make your life as easy as possible when it comes to writing about your life? Use the same two-word prompt every day—I promise you’ll be surprised at what comes up for you!
Don’t get me wrong, if you have bought or are thinking about buying a memory prompt journal as a gift, you’re my kind of person! I just think there are better (more effective, more foolproof) ways to encourage story sharing. How about you?
How to write a loving tribute to your spouse or partner
A love letter (or book!) overflowing with memories makes a thoughtful anniversary gift. Here, 14 writing prompts to help you honor—and surprise—your partner.
Whether you want to write a personal love letter for Valentine’s Day or an extended tribute to your spouse for a milestone anniversary, the writing prompts below will give you ideas for sharing your love on the page.
Read through the list of prompts and mark the ones that resonate the most—then start there with your writing. Some of the prompts may yield long stories while others might only spark a phrase or sentence; that’s okay. Our relationships are as unique as our signatures—honor what makes yours special!
One tip before you begin: Don’t put pressure on yourself to sound like anything other than you. Think of your writing as an extended letter to the one you love and let your voice come through.
14 thematic memory prompts to help write about your love
THE SETUP
How, when, and where did you meet? Tell the story of your first meeting, your courtship, and your favorite memories from the early days of your relationship.
CUTE QUIRKS
Share some of your partner’s quirks that make them them. Does she twist her hair around her finger when deep in thought? Does he put post-it notes all over the house to remind him of mundane things? Hone in on their character traits that are unique and lovable and…specific.
ADVENTURES OF A LIFETIME
Take this prompt in any direction you wish: Perhaps your biggest (ongoing?!) adventure has been parenthood—write about that. What other adventures have you been on together? Think travel destinations, new skills you endeavored to learn together, and passions you’ve developed over the years.
SAYINGS & PET NAMES
Do you have a special way of saying “I love you”? What about terms of endearment for one another? If there’s a fun story here, then of course tell it; otherwise simply weave your sayings and pet names throughout your writing.
HEARTH & HOME
How do you define home? Is it a more ephemeral notion of being together, or have you built spaces to live that embody your family philosophy? Describe the first place you lived together, the most challenging place you called home, and the home where you find yourselves now.
LOVING LIST
This one’s fun and invites creativity and playfulness: Write a list of “50 Things I Love About You” that includes everything you can think of, from seemingly obvious-yet-true things such as the color of their hair or the feel of them in bed beside you to more personal-and-unexpected things like “the way you set out a mug and a Splenda packet for me when you make coffee in the morning,” “the way you croon country music in the car,” or “the fact that you’re still trying to convert me to someone who will be on time.” The more specific here, the better!
MISHAPS & MISDEMEANORS
Write about “that time” you made a wrong turn and ended up weekending in a different town than you expected, or accidentally missing a birthday—little things that may have gone wrong that you weathered together (and maybe even ended up enjoying).
INSIDE JOKES
Do you and your partner glance across a crowded room and know exactly what the other is thinking? Are there inside jokes that you’ve shared for years? Write about your secret language of laughter and, well, just knowing what the other may need.
ROLE REVERSAL
How are you two different? Write about how you at times complement one another and at other times clash. Try to find the humor or the life lessons in your differences. Find the stories and also some underlying wisdom.
OFFER GRATITUDE
What are you most thankful for in your relationship? Think about your partner’s qualities that you appreciate, but also ways you mesh and make your way through the world together. Like with each of these memory prompts, try to hone in on some specific details or moments that come to mind when you think about gratitude.
GOING DEEP
Aim to write the most epic love letter, including thoughtful reflections such as:
times you missed your partner or wished they were near
ways your spouse has changed you or impacted your outlook on life
why you consider your partnership a successful one
your favorite romantic gestures from your years together
how you have manifested being there for one another “through good times and bad, through sickness and health.”
FROM THE ARCHIVE
Did you save early handwritten letters your partner sent you? How about everyday notes or even emails? Unearth these and consider including one or quotes from a few in your tribute.
BONUS REVEAL
You’ve been writing about your beloved all this time, but remember that sometimes the real gift is sharing a bit of YOURSELF. Consider telling them something they may not know about you yet. It could be a silly anecdote from your childhood or a deep-seated fear you’ve held for decades. No matter what you decide to share, allow yourself to be vulnerable.
BUCKET LIST
Perhaps you’ve been married for 25 years and you’re celebrating a host of favorite memories in this book. For this prompt, turn your attention to the memories you’d yet like to make. What’s still on your to-do list? What dreams do you hold for your future together?
Remember that your efforts to create something meaningful for the person you love is gift enough—this really is one occasion where “it’s the thought that counts.” So have fun with this, be thoughtful as you write, and you’re sure to craft a gift that your partner will cherish!
And if you need help packaging your extended love letter into an heirloom book, please reach out to see how we can work together.
A year’s worth of memory prompts to help you write your life
Every week you’ll get themed prompts to stir your memories, tips to write your stories with ease, and more! A unique gift for your loved one (or yourself)!
Have you decided you want to subscribe? Click here to purchase our annual Write Your Life email subscription for just $99!
I am thrilled to announce that my Write Your Life annual subscription is now live and available to purchase at an introductory discounted rate!
For years I have offered curated family history questions for free (and that hasn’t changed!). These free guides offer up questions that can be used to conduct family history interviews with loved ones OR as memory prompts to guide your personal writing. If you aren’t yet familiar, I am referring to:
I’ve also got a unique guide designed especially to empower kids to interview their grandparents, one of my favorite resources to date, for just $5.
These free (and almost-free 😉) resources offer a wealth of ideas for anyone interested in preserving their stories—so why would I create something new and expect people to pay for it? While I am committed to sharing complimentary DIY tips and ideas for legacy preservation, I wanted to provide something a little more robust: something giftable (!!), approachable yet chock-full of value, and easy yet rich with potential.
What a Write Your Life subscription offers
The Write Your Life annual subscription offers a full year of weekly emails for anyone who wants to write about their life (even if the longest thing you’ve ever written is your signature!).
There are a gazillion courses to learn the nuts and bolts of memoir writing. This is not one of them. Here the participant will dive right in—to finding their memories and writing their stories.
Every week you (or your gift recipient) will get:
prompts to spark memories in a specific theme
specific (enjoyable!) writing assignments
concrete tips to improve writing and stay on track
…and a dose of inspiration.
PLUS, a bonus printable sheet so you can revisit your prompts any time.
The annual subscription—normally $132, but on sale now for $99—kicks off with six weeks of Childhood Memories prompts, followed by prompts for Food Memories; the third theme explores Life Transitions. From there you will move into themes including Identity; Fun & Favorites; Lessons, Values & Legacy; plus more creative themes to continue exploring your memories.
We’re talking 52 weeks of open-ended memory prompts!
How are Write Your Life prompts different from the free family history questions?
Here’s a quick rundown of how a paid annual Write Your Life subscription compares to the free family history guides on my site, so you can decide which might be right for you:
WRITE YOUR LIFE SUBSCRIPTION
✔ Subscription is tailored specifically to WRITING your memories, rather than family history interviews.
✔ Prompts are delivered weekly to your in-box, helping you maintain a regular memory-keeping practice.
✔ Prompts and questions are open-ended. (Open-ended writing prompts are both inspiring and able to be used multiple times—so if one theme really resonates for you, print your “assignment” and save it to use again!)
✔ Prompts are probing, encouraging you to go beyond surface memories to finding meaning.
✔ Each email includes a simple but relevant writing tip.
✔ Each email includes an inspirational quote on that week’s topic.
✔ Every prompt is beautifully designed as a printable page to add to your personal library.
FREE GUIDES
✔ Guide is tailored specifically to FAMILY HISTORY INTERVIEWS, rather than writing your memories.
✔ Questions are beautifully designed as a printable guide to add to your personal library.
✘ There are no weekly emails, so no accountability, and no help creating a regular memory-keeping practice.
✘ Prompts and questions are NOT open-ended.
✘ Prompts are straightforward rather than probing, encouraging fun memories but maybe not overly thoughtful responses.
✘ There are no writing tips or inspirational ideas to supplement prompts.
Why a Write Your Life subscription makes a thoughtful gift
What could be as meaningful as inviting someone you love to share their stories?! Buying a year’s worth of memory and writing prompts for a family member tells them you value their legacy. That you want to learn more about them. Hear their stories. Connect more deeply.
It’s a great gift idea for the person in your life who is challenging to buy for—but for whom you want to get something truly special.
It’s also a unique way to create something extraordinary for your loved ones—buy YOURSELF a subscription, write about your life, and share what you write with them!! (Don’t you wish someone had gifted you such a legacy?)
How to get your limited-time discounted rate
Through the end of the year I am offering the Write Your Life Annual Subscription for just $99 (regularly $129). There is no discount code needed, and no limit to how many you can buy (gift it to multiple family members, why don’t you?).
More memory-keeping gift ideas
The best gift for a milestone birthday? A tribute book filled with love!
Here’s how to make a tribute book for their milestone birthday—your step-by-step guide to the most unique, thoughtful gift you can give someone you love!
Have you ever wondered how to make a tribute book for a loved one’s milestone birthday? Keep reading for a step-by-step plan (plus some tips for writing the best tributes ever!).
Early on at Modern Heirloom Books, creating tribute books in honor of deceased loved ones became a bit of a specialty of mine (inspired by the first book I created memorializing my own mom). I soon realized, though, that this same format could be used to honor living family members—and what better occasion than for a milestone birthday?
Whether you call them birthday books, memory books, or tribute books, the idea is to gather photos of and stories about the gift recipient. Once designed and printed, these one-of-a-kind books make a most meaningful (surprise!) birthday gift. But where to begin?
The very notion of having to put all these disparate pieces together can stop some people from ever undertaking a birthday tribute book—but I’ve got you covered. What follows are the essential steps to create the best tribute book as a unique, sure-to-be-treasured gift for a 40th, 50th, 60th, 70th, 80th, 90th (you get the idea!) birthday.
Oh, and one more thing: It’s key to start this process early, both so you are not feeling the pressure of a last-minute rush to finish and so you can have a cushion should any delays occur at the printer. How much time will you need? My best guess is about four months from start to finish.
1 . Consider who will contribute.
Your first order of business is to create a list of everyone you would like to participate. Think about family members, friends (new and old), work colleagues, sports teammates—anyone who knows and loves the birthday celebrant.
2. Designate a way for people to contribute.
How will you invite participants to share their stories? You may have a dedicated email address for receiving tributes and photos; or create a private web page or Dropbox folder for people to easily upload their materials, for instance. It’s handy to have a checklist of all contributors (I create this in a Google spreadsheet) so you can check each person off as their files come to you; label columns as
NAME
TRIBUTE RECEIVED
TRIBUTE EDITED
PHOTO(S) RECEIVED
PHOTO RESOLUTION CHECKED
NOTES.
3. Gather photos of the birthday celebrant.
I generally recommend including 1-3 photos per tribute, on average. That may mean that some friends or colleagues, for instance, have no photos, while close family members may have a handful extra. Curation is key: Ask for images that convey the subject’s most enduring traits, that capture happy times or vivid moments from their life; and that illustrate stories you (or others) plan to write about them. Include photos from different stages of their life, too—from childhood through old age—so you show their personality and experiences but do not overwhelm. And ideally, you’ll want to gather photos of each storyteller (the writers of the tributes) with the recipient whenever possible! The pictures should complement the stories, not detract from them. Technical tip: Source only high-resolution images—that means 300 dpi for print—and have print photos professionally scanned (it’s worth going the extra mile here else risk being disappointed with your final book).
4. Capture stories about your loved one.
It’s time to start writing your birthday tribute, and to send those invitations out inviting others to share, too (see Step No. 2, above). Before beginning, spend five minutes jotting down all the things about the person that make you smile, laugh, or feel strongly—include phrases about their traits, sure, but focus on specific experiences with them. You may want to use a few of the photos you gathered to stir your memories. Another foolproof way to get your stories flowing: Converse with a mutual friend or family member about the subject. One story will remind you of another, and you’ll undoubtedly be inspired—so either hit “record” during your conversation or have a laptop or notebook handy to write immediately afterwards.
5. Put it all together in a book.
In professional bookmaking parlance, we call this the production part of your project: editing, designing, and producing print-ready files; sourcing and working with a printer; and ensuring quality along the way. There are some DIY options out there—scrapbooking and the free software Bookwright among them—and I encourage you to give this a go if you have some creative experience and are a solid project manager. Remember, though: No one expects you to become a pro at this overnight, and there’s a lot to juggle to put a tribute book such as this together; so consider hiring a pro for this step to make your life easier, and to ensure you are thrilled with the book that is ultimately created. (Reach out if you'd like to talk about working together.)
6. Bonus tip: Set deadlines for each step!
Without deadlines, I doubt your project will get finished. Since you are creating this book for a milestone birthday, your deadlines are clear—work backwards from the date the books are needed (either their exact birthday or the date of a party in their honor). Here is a suggested timeline:
8 weeks before birthday:
Finalize list of contributors.
Record/confirm their email addresses or phone numbers (however you will communicate with them about their contributions).
Create checklist of contributors per Step No. 2 above.
Invite contributors to send their tributes and photos for the birthday book.
6 weeks before birthday:
Initial deadline for tributes and photos due to you (you can extend by a few days here or there for stragglers if necessary)
5 weeks before deadline:
Edit and design the tributes into a coherent, beautiful book.
4 weeks before deadline:
Order book from printer. (Note: This timeframe should be based on the estimated turnaround time from your specific printer. I always, always allot at least one full week extra to account for mail delays or production snafus.)
Setting clear deadlines such as this will not only lend your project a sense of urgency, it will give you a way to stay accountable—and ultimately get everything done!
The best tributes honor the birthday celebrant with specific stories of shared experiences and special times. Selecting key quotes to design larger on the page ensures that even if they’re just flipping through their gift, they will encounter meaningful notes along the way!
Ideas for making a birthday celebrant feel special
Use the prompt “remember the time...” to offer up:
Something ridiculous you did together that still makes you laugh (or, ahem, blush)!
A memory from your childhood that they may have forgotten.
That time you traveled together...or cooked together, messed up together, sang karaoke together, considered doing something daring together—you get the idea!
Or tell them a story that might surprise them, perhaps about:
Something seemingly insignificant that they did (for you or for another) that made a major impact on you.
Advice they gave that you took to heart.
Something they said off the cuff that resonated deeply.
Always be specific and offer up stories and memories that will make the gift recipient smile and, most importantly, feel deeply.
Write the way you speak and I guarantee your story will turn out beautifully. (If the notion of writing truly paralyzes you, use the voice recorder app on your smart phone to talk about your memories, then you can transcribe it later.) Allow yourself to be vulnerable, and use the list you brainstormed above to inform the tribute you are writing.
Good luck with this most meaningful project, and congratulations on taking the first step to creating the most unique and special gift for your loved one’s milestone birthday!
Simple, modern memory-keeping: How to tell the stories behind your family photos
These 3 ideas for telling the stories behind your favorite family photos are easy-peasy—and they’ll get you well on your way to preserving your family legacy.
Can a single photo tell a story? The answer is a wholehearted YES. The question becomes: How will you tell it?
Here are three ideas for choosing one single photo and transforming it into a gift that is destined to become a family heirloom.
3 ways to tell a photo story
1 - Frame your photo—with an extended caption.
Who’s to say that a photo must be framed on its own? There are myriad ways to incorporate words into your wall art. First, choose a photo that by itself seems to tell a story: It’s clear when or where it was taken, and there are emotions conveyed in people’s expressions. Then, write a brief synopsis of the story behind the picture: 200-300 words is usually sufficient to paint a picture that includes the vital details (who is pictured, the date and specific place if they are known) as well as a little bit about what makes it so special (humor goes a long way!).
Once you have both the photo and your story, it’s time to typeset the text so that it looks worthy of being framed. If you have access to design software such as InDesign (favored by professionals) or Lucidpress (a free alternative), you may consider aligning the text next to or below the image, saving it as a JPEG, then having it printed on photo paper by your local digital printer. If that sounds intimidating, don’t worry: You can create beautiful text right in a Google or Word document, print it on paper, then have it framed in its own mat window within the frame, as shown below.
Here’s a sample caption that tells the story behind the photo above—in fewer than 200 words: “I will always remember Abuela Manuela wearing a brightly patterned house dress, smiling, and smelling like garlic or some other pungent spice that seemed to permeate her pores. Every time we visited her home in Paramus, New Jersey, she had something for dinner simmering on the stove (to this day I often cook her recipe for ropa vieja, but it’s never quite the same!). She used to slip dollar bills or fifty-cent coins into our pockets when we were leaving as kids, but it was her hugs that I longed for—they were tight and comforting, and you could feel the love. This picture of her in her kitchen in 1990 captures her spirit just so: her lipstick always smudged from the countless kisses she bestowed on her grandchildren, her gold jewelry always on, even if she was working in the garden outside, and bathed in the warm glow of her favorite room—a room where we kids were always welcomed, and always spoiled. We miss you, Abuela!”
2 - Mail your photo—on a custom postcard that’s surprisingly easy to make!
It’s a rare occasion indeed when we send someone we love snail mail just because. But when it’s as simple as uploading a special photo from your phone and dictating a personal message, what’s stopping us? Modern technology has made mailing Grandma or Poppy a custom postcard as easy as 1-2-3.
So get to it: Pick a picture of your kids that you know their grandparents would love to see (think big—holding the trophy at the spelling bee; and think small—licking the spoon while baking cupcakes with mom). Upload it to a site such as Postsnap or via an app like TouchNote, and for less than five dollars you can personalize and mail a postcard they’ll treasure.
Remember to tell the story of the photo with words. Incorporate dialogue (especially that adorable kidspeak that they’ll one day grow out of!), describe emotions (yours and your kids’), and of course include vital details (when, where). I am willing to bet that the excited response from your recipient will warrant more of these being made—and sent—in the not-too-distant future! Bonus idea: Mail a duplicate to yourself, too, to save in a scrapbook or keepsake box for your children.
For a few dollars more than the cost of a postage stamp you can create and send a customized postcard to a loved one that will delight and surprise.
3 - Journal about your photo—with the intent of using it for a book later.
The idea of creating a photo book—no less a photo book with stories!—is undoubtedly overwhelming. The key to getting past the overwhelm is to tackle one photo and one story at a time.
I suggest setting aside a journal specifically for your photo stories. Then set a goal that is manageable—say, one photo for every month. At the end of each month, go through all the pictures you have taken to decide upon one that feels right (click here for some tips on choosing the best photos for story sharing). If you are journaling on your computer, copy and paste the photo to the top of your journal page before beginning to type. If you are handwriting your memories, print a copy of the photo to tape into your book.
Then, begin writing. Set the scene: What was happening when this photo was taken: Was it just before your kid’s big soccer final, when anticipation was running high? Or was it the day after Thanksgiving, when everyone was exhausted but content to lounge around the house together? By choosing moments that encompass all aspects of your life—both the milestones and the everyday activities—you’re sure to preserve stories that will resonate with your family for years to come.
You won’t believe a year has passed when you write about that twelfth photograph! (And hey, don’t let me stop you from writing MORE than one photo story every month—the idea is simply to set a reasonable goal!). At this point you may want to create and print a photo book that more permanently preserves your photo stories, or you may simply want to keep going for another year. My suggestion? Do both!
Whether you are journaling digitally or by hand, be sure to include the photo at the beginning of your story—and include the vital details that you might assume are a given, but that truly need to be recorded to ensure they are not forgotten: who, what, when, and where!
Do you have other ideas for preserving the stories behind your family photos? I’d love to hear them (you can share them in the comments below, or hop on Instagram where I am talking with the broader memory-keeping community about this topic a lot!
And, of course, if you’d like help preserving your family stories and photographs, please reach out to set up a free, no-pressure half-hour consultation to see how I might be able to help.
3 Best holiday gift ideas that honor family memories
Give your loved ones a gift they will cherish for years to come—one that puts memories front and center. Here are 3 (doable!) ideas to inspire happy tears.
One-of-a-kind gifts that preserve memories are the best kind of holiday presents!
Are you tired of gifting things that no one in your family really needs? Having trouble finding meaningful ideas for holiday giving? Here are three amazing Christmas or Hanukkah gift ideas, including tips and resources for going the DIY route as well as ideas for getting a pro to handle it all, start to finish. Happy memory-making!
1 - Create a family recipe book.
Not just any recipe book, but one filled with the ingredients and how-tos for your favorite dishes AND the stories and memories associated with them.
Be sure to include:
the foods’ origins (Who made it first? Who might have changed it over the years? Does it derive from a specific region or culture?
notes about any special ingredients (and by this I mean how to source unusual spices, perhaps, but also when using a certain brand—like U-Bet syrup or Eagle condensed milk—is crucial to a dish’s success)
photos of handwritten recipe cards (those grease stains and crossed-out notations add incredible texture to your book!)
even simple foods if they hold special meaning to your family (Mom’s quick cinnamon toast, say, or Poppy’s three-ingredient holiday egg cream)
DIY family recipe book help
If you’re ready to dive in, these tips for getting the family involved in preserving your food heritage may help get you started.
And if you’re not quite ready but love the idea, these recipe cards have space for recording memories alongside your recipes, and they’re a great precursor to creating a family cookbook (they make a unique and thoughtful host gift, too). Use coupon code HOLIDAY2021 for 25% off at checkout, through the end of this year.
Consider a professionally created heirloom recipe book.
If you love the idea of honoring your family’s food heritage but don’t have the time or inclination to undertake such a project yourself, I’m here for you. Let’s set up a free call to discuss your project.
2 - Get those photos off your phone and into a book.
If your photos are sitting on your phone or computer, then you have a bunch of digital files, not a collection of memories. Get them in print for a gift guaranteed to make them (and you!) feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
The hardest part? Believe it or not, it’s not designing your book or finding a printer, it’s curating your photos. Huh? By curating I mean deciding which photos to put into your memory book and which to leave on the cutting-room floor.
Choose photos for your book that:
show you and your family members as you really are—don’t just choose well-lit posed shots and flattering selfies; rather, pick pictures that convey your personalities and exude real emotion
hold some special meaning, even if it’s elusive to outsiders
mark moments beyond the milestones—so, alongside those birthday and anniversary photos, include images from around the dinner table, or sitting under blankets for family movie nights (I guarantee these everyday scenes will grow exponentially in meaning over time!)
DIY photo book help
If you’re ready to get started, I challenge you to add some long captions describing your memories so your family photo book is wonderfully elevated to true memory-book.
Check this page out if you’d like some help with photo book themes.
Hand your photo book over to a pro
Need help with any part of this process? I can help you curate your photos, capture your memories, and design and print your photo book. Set up a consultation or consider buying a gift certificate for future services.
3 - Give them the gift of a generous listener (and time to share their stories!).
Asking someone to share their memories—and then giving them your undivided attention and heartfelt curiosity—is a gift we give not nearly enough. It’s why literally every single one of my personal history clients thanks me profusely for listening to them. For asking follow-up questions and never judging their experiences. For opening my heart and inviting their stories.
And you know what? This gift is free for you to give your loved ones. All it costs is time and a little bit of effort (I’ve even created a free gift certificate printable you can download and present to your loved one!)..
Fair warning: Your mom, granddad, or whomever you plan to bless with this gift, may very well have a look of confusion when they hear what you’re gifting them. Don’t let that deter you—instead, reiterate to them just how much you love them and value their stories, and how spending time together in such a way is as much a gift to you as it is to them. (It really is!!)
A few ideas for giving the gift of listening:
Be an active listener. Give your family member non-verbal cues as they are telling their stories—nod, show emotion on your face. These cues help them know, deep down, that they are being heard, and will urge them to keep sharing
Ask follow-up questions. Your curiosity is a wonderful driver of their stories. And by asking relevant, perceptive, timely questions, you will be helping them construct their story.
That said, be quiet sometimes. There are always times when silence—even an extended, potentially awkward silence—is called for. If you are truly listening and reading their cues, you may feel when this is the case: Do they have a faraway look in their eyes, like they are still inhabiting the world of their story? Give them a few beats to stay there. Have they dropped some profound or surprising insight on you? Just wait. Your patience is a gift, an opening for them to dig deeper and offer up even more out loud.
Don’t judge. Period. Approach this conversation with an open heart and an abundance of empathy.
DIY resources for interviewing your loved one
Will you be the one conducting the interview (or, if that sounds too “official,” leading the conversation)? This free printable guide has a great array of questions to help jog your loved one’s memory and get the stories flowing.
Will your child be asking the questions? This Kid Kit contains everything a child will need to spend quality story sharing time with their grandparents, from questions to historical tidbits to bonus family history activities.
Okay, the fundamental value in this activity is spending quality time together and learning more about your family elder—that’s really and truly it. However, don’t forget that it’s also a prime opportunity for recording their stories. So if you’d like to capture them for posterity (and I suggest you do!), check out this guide from the Smithsonian with specific tips on setting up a voice or video recorder and preserving your questions and answers.
Get some expert help to preserve their stories
Once you have had your story sharing session, you may want to consider having them professionally edited and designed into an heirloom memory book. If so, please reach out to see how I could help you bring your dream book to life.
More essential reads about Christmas memories:
Announcing group gifting option for tribute books
If you’ve wanted to create a surprise tribute book telling your loved one JUST how special they are but cost is a factor, consider asking contributors to chip in.
A new offering from Modern Heirloom Books is group gifting, allowing all contributors to chip in towards a most unique surprise gift: a tribute book honoring someone you love.
At the beginning of the pandemic I worried that my business would suffer. Creating books about our lives could seem like an indulgence, after all (though I’ve argued to the contrary). What I didn’t expect was how being forcefully distanced from our loved ones would make so many folks turn inward—and gain a renewed appreciation for all we hold dear.
The first tribute book inquiry came just a few days after New Jersey, where I reside, declared a state of emergency, effectively quarantining us in our homes: A man in South Carolina wanted to create a book for his wife’s 60th birthday. Three days later, I got a request from someone just a county over wanting to create a book for her mother’s 60th birthday. A week later, I began working on a tribute book honoring a teacher in New York City who had died of Covid-19.
I have been working consistently on tribute books for people all over the country every week since then.
And what a privilege it has been! As I gather and edit the tributes for these books, I “get to know” the people being honored. Through personal anecdotes about them, through carefully chosen photographs from their lives, I begin to understand why these individuals are so loved. Lucky me!
In order to be able to bring this service to as many people as possible, I sourced new printers—ones that could create books of a high caliber (beautiful enough to truly be called “heirlooms”) at a lower price point. I streamlined my process even more, so I could guarantee a quick enough turnaround to ensure books would arrive in time for birthday celebrations, even on a tight schedule.
And now, I am thrilled to offer a group gifting option.
The Inspiration Behind Crowd-Sourced Tribute Books
I am working now on a book for three girls honoring the mother they lost at a very young age; the book was begun by a family friend. When one of the daughters casually mentioned that no one ever talks about her mom, this friend felt inspired to encourage her circle of loved ones to, well, start talking! We are gathering stories about this beloved mom in three books—one for each girl to take with her wherever life takes her. My client is paying for this project herself, but along the way, various contributors have asked me how they could help. And, an idea was born…
Beyond wanting to relieve the financial burden for the one gift-giver who hires me, I also wanted to extend this service to more people. By allowing contributors to each chip in for their share, even folks who want to create a tribute book but can’t afford it themselves can now, still, begin to create the gift of a lifetime for someone they care about.
At just $60 per contributor, the cost of a professionally-created tribute book is accessible.
And not only can participants take heart in knowing they are giving a most meaningful heirloom gift to their loved one, but they also receive a digital copy of the completed tribute book, a special keepsake they will cherish, too.
The process couldn’t be simpler for the project coordinator, either! No worries about collecting money, nagging friends and family, and keeping track of all the details—nope, we do that, too. Honestly, I’ve done everything I can think of to make this process as easy as possible for you!
Taking the Next Steps
Are you imagining Dad opening up a tribute book all about him? Or Nonna, or Mommy, or your best-friend-since-kindergarten?
Who would you like to honor?
Telling someone you love them—in a gorgeous, meaningful book!—has never been easier.
Please give me a call or reach out and set up an appointment to chat about how we can bring your tribute book to life—and how you can easily invite friends and family to contribute!
Related Reading:
8 Tips for Creating Your Own Tribute Book in Honor of a Lost Loved One
Your Mom’s Turning 70 and You STILL Don’t Know What to Get Her?
How to Get Started Sharing Your Love in a Book
(and what people are saying about their experiences working with us on their own tribute books!)
