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Life Story Links: October 4, 2022
Curated just for you: Recent stories on the craft of life writing, memories held in objects, legacy building, new memoir, and honoring loved ones after death.
“Clearly, the most joyous outcome of the life review process is that you really do treat your past as history, you appreciate your triumphs, and the misery becomes part of the context of your life, not the focus.”
—Linda Feldman
Vintage postcard depicting the “Temple de Thésée, Athènes,” courtesy of the Miriam and Ira D. Wallach Division of Art, Prints and Photographs: Picture Collection, The New York Public Library Digital Collections.
Aftermath
RELEASE
“Nowhere in the five boroughs was distant enough: If the subway could get me there, I might wake one night from an Ambien-induced sleep to find myself stabbing Mom repeatedly.” Rachel Cline’s naked essay in Dorothy Parker’s Ashes.
ABUELA’S STORIES
“When I’m writing, I close my eyes and my grandmother’s voice comes to me: ‘Each one of us is responsible for keeping history alive.’ ” Armando Lucas Correa’s grandmother’s stories about Cuba inspired him to write.
LOSS, GRIEF, LEGACY
While packing up the apartment of his late mother, Gloria Vanderbilt, journalist Anderson Cooper begins recording his experiences. In the resulting podcast, he explores how we find meaning in the things our loved ones leave behind, how we navigate grief, and how to live on after loss—with laughter, and with love. Here’s a preview:“
Words last: A kind of legacy
“AS LONG AS YOU READ US, WE’RE NOT DEAD”
As author Terry Pratchett’s dementia became prohibitive, his assistant’s role grew to amanuensis, to “keeper of the anecdotes,” and he finished the biographical book that Pratchett had begun, A Life With Footnotes.
“WOMAN WITHOUT SHAME”
“I wanted to understand my father, a man who served in the Second World War without understanding or speaking English. If you don’t write a story like that down, it’ll be like it never happened. He doesn’t have Ken Burns trying to tell his story.” Sandra Cisneros, who calls Studs Terkel her ‘literary ancestor,’ in conversation.
LETTING THE STORY MARINATE
“For [my new memoir], Beautiful Country, I spent three years (and one might say, most of my life) thinking about the book, researching through my diary and retracing my steps, and processing how I wanted to write it.”
The stuff of memories
SARTORIAL STORIES
“Most of the clothes I’ve saved in my closet cannot be recycled physically; they hang there as aide-mémoire to a life.” Julia Reed on the memories woven into well-worn clothes.
THE TRAPPER KEEPER GENERATION
“When I was interviewing people about their school supplies, I was really asking how they felt about themselves during their vulnerable adolescence.” An iconic binder elicits strong memories and visceral responses for these writers.
UNIVERSITY ARCHIVE
“Lucky for us, Hemingway was a pack rat. He saved everything from bullfight tickets and bar bills to a list of rejected story titles written on a piece of cardboard.” A new collection at Penn State provides insight into the author’s writing process and his personal life from childhood onward.
Crafting our stories
WRITE YOUR LIFE
Last week I shared an iterative life writing prompt that gets your pen moving and delivers a trove of future ideas for your memoir. Bonus: It’s a fun one!
“EVERYONE’S GOT A STORY IN THEM”
“Many of us regret not asking our parents and grandparents more about their lives while we had the chance, but I’ve yet to come across anyone who has regretted writing their story.” The Guardian reports on a boom in the personal history industry.
AN INTENTIONAL JOURNEY
“Writing about myself and reading what I wrote to strangers changed me. Or, did it reveal me?” Barbara McCarthy on how taking a guided autobiography course was a significant turning point in her life.
UNEXPECTED TEACHERS
“Those early lessons I got on craft—from likely and unlikely sources—have stayed with me through every essay, every editing job, every student manuscript, and through to writing my memoir.”
...and a few more links
Pieces of history: Urgent effort to preserve thousands of pairs of children’s shoes at Auschwitz
Solito is a personal story of immigration that sheds light on the universal.
A glimpse at early Cormac McCarthy interviews that were recently discovered.
Two new grief-tinged memoirs of male platonic love and loss.
Search for a Hebrew cookbook was “part of a lifetime of connecting with his roots through food.”
Short takes
Life Story Links: March 15, 2022
This week's curated reading list for memory-keepers and family historians includes plenty of craft advice as well as first-person stories to inspire your own.
“Here’s the thing: The book that will most change your life is the one you write.”
—Seth Godin
In honor of St. Patrick’s Day this week, a vintage shamrock postcard with “Scenes from dear old Ireland”
When Things Hold History
WHAT’S LEFT BEHIND
Following a brief meditation on legacy from The Isolation Journals founder Suleika Jaouad, Joy Juliet Bullen writes about how a childhood photo with her father prompted more than memories.; plus, a writing prompt.
HER HOME IS LIKE A MUSEUM
“Each piece needs a chance to sing its own song,” says the Staten Island schoolteacher who has collected more than 20,000 artifacts, now up for auction, that “tells the whole saga of African American history.”
LOVE LETTERS
“As I age, I have a newfound appreciation for recognizing that my grandparents and the elders in my family have led complete and full lives that I will never fully understand or really know about.” How a newfound stash of love letters from his parents gave him a glimpse of who they were before him.
TASTY RELICS OF ANOTHER TIME
“Slowly, I’ve accepted that my recipe book is not a work in progress but an artifact, which contains hints and scraps of my former self.” Charlotte Mendelson on her “beautiful, delusional recipe book.”
A DELIBERATE PROCESS
“Professional home organizers are reporting a spike in calls from older customers asking for help sorting through their belongings, seeking to dole out the heirlooms and sentimental items and toss the excess.” (As always on such pieces, many of the 800+ comments are worth a read, too.)
“CURATING TANGIBLE PHOTOS”
“I hope to build an album like my grandmother’s, one that shares my history. That proves I was here, and I lived.”
First Person Stories You’ll Want to Read
UNCOVERING FAMILY STORIES, AT LAST
“Poppy could make muscles that I could not crush; Grandma only ever cooked and cleaned and kvetched.” But Noah Lederman’s grandmother held many Holocaust stories herself—why had he never realized?
WELCOME HOME, HARRIET
“I have often remarked that I didn’t go into medicine to simply bear witness, but the work has a way of forcing you to do just that.” How her grandmother’s loss made this geriatrician think differently about preparing people for death.
AUTHORITY FIGURES
“My dad and I aren’t sure how I knew so much when I was that young,” Elizabeth Cooper writes about the intersection of her mother’s extramarital affairs and her own shameful feelings around sex in this moving piece.
Personal History in Action
REMINISCENCE THERAPY AND DEMENTIA
How to create a memory kit for a loved one with dementia: “The point of the exercise is not only to help a loved one remember and improve cognitive function but also to help the senior engage in conversation and feel like a valued participant in the discussion.”
WAR, POLITICS, SACRIFICE
In light of recent events in Ukraine, Rhonda Lauritzen turns to thoughts of conflict—specifically, how to write about our own experiences of hardship and war, and why we should consider the impact world events had on our ancestors.
Elements of Style
STYLE AND SUBSTANCE
Last week I wrote about why the presentation of your life story book does indeed matter, for the Biographers Guild of Greater New York; and, on my own site, how adding photo captions can elevate your family photo book to family heirloom.
MYSELF, ANONYMOUSLY
“Good ghostwriters are invisible, giving away our best lines without leaving a trace of ourselves.” Caroline Cala Donofrio shares lessons learned from interviewing celebrities for their ghostwritten books.
Author, Author
DICKENS, 1851
“A captivating entertainer, Dickens sought to make life as enchanting as a show,” reads this New Yorker piece that takes a look at a new “slow biography” of the author from Robert Douglas-Fairhurst
GETTIN HER DUE
“I found such a deep, personal connection with Zora’s life and journey. I felt compelled to help people everywhere learn about her.” Meet the scholar who shares the life and legacy of Zora Neale Hurston through storytelling.
A WIDOW’S LEGACY
Read this enticing excerpt from a new biography of Mary Welsh Hemingway, the journalist who became Ernest Hemingway's fourth wife.
...and a Few More Links
A new book and traveling exhibition highlight the work of Mississippi photographer O.N. Pruitt, which expose harsh reality of the Jim Crow South.
Study shows that viewing nostalgic images from childhood reduces pain perception.
A “magical place” inspires a memory book worthy of gift-giving
A look at new family history technology and keynote messages shared at RootsTech 2022
Are young people hoarding photos so they don’t lose memories?
10 best off-the-shelf memory books for grandparents to tell their family stories
Short Takes
Life Story Links: January 19, 2021
Timely reads on new memoirs and biographies, tips for fine-tuning your life story writing & curating your family photo archive, plus more links to bookmark now.
“I could tell this story with myself as the villain or the hero, innocent bystander or agent provocateur, and each time I’d be telling a form of the ‘truth.’ What is the value of a truth that has an infinite number of forms?”
—Marc Hammer
On this day in history: Snow fell for the first time in Miami on January 19, 1977 (though for the most part the flakes melted when they hit the ground).
Recent Memoir & Biography
“SUFFERING WITHOUT SENTIMENTALITY”
“I wanted to abandon all this personal history, its darkness and secrecy, its private grievances, its well-licked sorrows and prides—to thrust it from me like a manhole cover,” Bette Howland wrote in her 1974 memoir W-3, which has been recently reissued.
ON WRITING AND LIFE
Gabriel Byrne’s new memoir, Walking with Ghosts, has been hailed as a “masterpiece” by Colum McCann and as “dreamy, lyrical, and utterly unvarnished” by Colm Toibin. Listen in as Byrne talks about memory, loneliness, and more.
ANOTHER SIDE OF SYLVIA
“There’s this sense in other biographies that she was only writing to please other people—to get love from her mother, her professors, her teachers—and I thought that short-changed her own sense of ambition and determination and the pleasure that she got out of writing.” Heather Clark on not falling into the Sylvia Plath trap.
Timely Tips
TREASURE, NOT TRASH
Last week I wrote about what everyone can do to ensure their own family photo collections are inviting to the next generation—for, whether we want to believe it or not, many kids simply throw away those once cherished pictures.
LISTEN UP
“What might happen if you read your memoir aloud as if talking to a therapist…?” David Perez ponders in this piece on the power of speaking your writing to life (spoiler alert: there is substantial power in the exercise).
FREE SELF-PUBLISHING WEBINAR JAN. 25
During “Everything You Want to Know About Self-Publishing but Are Afraid to Ask” you’ll “leave with a roadmap to the self-publishing journey so you can start taking action now.” Register for the free January 25 Zoom class here.
...and a Few More Links
The Statue of Liberty—Ellis Island Foundation has opened a new online shop.
“You can’t tell a life story or family history with 60,000 photos.”
Learn all about the Army Navy “E” Award, a.k.a. the Excellence in War Production Award (WWII).
Study sheds light on how the timing of memory is encoded in the hippocampus.
Singer Billie Eilish set to release photo book filled with personal memories.
Read the current issue of Brevity.
California–based personal historian Perry Hamilton reflects on a wedding.
Preserving memories one image at a time
Short Takes