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How can I write about my life when I am still living it?
The three most common excuses I hear for not writing about your life “yet,” and how—and why—to overcome them. It’s not too soon for your memoir, I promise.
Even if you don’t love to journal, keeping a simple ideas notebook—with snippets of memories, headlines that resonated, quotes from loved ones, ticket stubs, whatever may prompt life writing ideas later—is a powerful tool. Use a simple composition notebook, or grab this lay-flat one from our store.
There’s a common misconception that a memoir—or any personal writing—needs to be a finished product, a neatly wrapped narrative with a clear beginning, middle, and end. But life doesn’t work that way, and neither does great storytelling.
The truth is, the best time to start writing about your life is right now—not years from now, when everything has “settled.” Writing as you live allows you to capture moments in real-time, with fresh emotions and raw details that might fade with time. It’s not about having all the answers; it’s about documenting the journey.
So, how do you begin? Let’s break down some of the biggest hesitations and how to move past them.
The 3 most common excuses that it’s ‘too soon’ to write about your life
“I don’t know how my story ends.”
Good news: You don’t need an ending to start writing. Memoir and personal essays don’t require a final chapter before you begin—many of the most compelling life stories are explorations, not conclusions.
💡 Try this: Instead of worrying about how everything ties together, focus on individual moments that feel meaningful right now. Write about a recent experience, a challenge you’re navigating, or a lesson you’re learning in real time.
📖 Example: Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert
Gilbert didn’t write her memoir after she had “figured everything out.” She wrote it in the middle of transformation, capturing a period of self-discovery. Her story unfolds as she travels through Italy, India, and Indonesia, and it doesn’t wrap up with a perfect ending—just a deeper understanding of herself.
👉 Further Reading: How to use short vignettes to create a mosaic of your life.
“I haven’t achieved anything ‘big’ yet.”
You don’t need a dramatic, bestselling-worthy life event to write about your experiences. Some of the most powerful personal writing comes from small, everyday moments—the way you felt on a quiet morning, a childhood memory that keeps resurfacing, the way certain music transports you to another time.
💡 Try this: Instead of chasing “big” moments, focus on specific details that make a memory or realization come alive. If you keep a journal, flip through an old one to discover how compelling small experiences from your everyday life can be.
📖 Example: An American Childhood by Annie Dillard
One of the first memoirs I ever read, Dillard’s book isn’t about a single, dramatic event—it’s about how she experiences the world as a child growing up in Pittsburgh. She writes about curiosity, wonder, and the process of paying attention to life as it unfolds, proving that even the smallest moments can make for profound storytelling. I highly recommend it as a model to emulate.
👉 Further Reading: How to choose which life story theme to explore first.
“What If My Perspective Changes?”
Your perspective will change—and that’s a good thing. The beauty of writing while living is that your story evolves—and your writing can, too. You can revisit memories with new understanding, update reflections with fresh insight, and track how your views shift over time.
💡 Try this: Start a “living memoir” journal where you capture thoughts and stories as they happen. Revisit entries later to see how your perspective has changed.
📖 Example: Hourglass: Time, Memory, Marriage by Dani Shapiro
One of my favorite books from one of my favorite authors, Shapiro’s Hourglass explores how we evolve and change over time, and how those changes impact her relationship and sense of self. Instead of writing from a place of finality, she embraces the shifting nature of perspective—reflecting on the past while still actively living her present.
👉 Further Reading: 5 steps to drafting your own library of life writing prompts.
Your life doesn’t need to be finished to be worth writing about. Your words matter right now—in the middle of the mess, in the midst of discovery, even before you have all the answers.
So, pick up the pen. Start where you are. Your story is unfolding, and that’s exactly why you should write it.
Life Story Links: October 7, 2025
An incredibly rich roundup of stories for the week of October 7, 2025—with lots about AI, memoir, and memory; the craft of life story preservation; and more.
“I believe that at some level most families want to have a record left of their effort to be a family, however flawed that effort was, and they will give you their blessing and will thank you for taking on the job—if you do it honestly and not for the wrong reasons.”
—William Zinsser
Vintage postcard depicting an illustration entitled “Bringing Home the Harvest,” postmarked 1906, from the personal ephemera collection of Dawn Roode.
Listening for stories
HER NEXT CHAPTER
“I was in a moment emotionally—both as a storyteller and as a mother, and as a woman—where I was really in a season of deep listening in my own life, and to my own heart, and to what was going on.” Tembi Locke returns with “an audio-forward memoir”; listen to an excerpt here.
THE GREAT THANKSGIVING LISTEN
“For years, educators have been the heart and soul of [StoryCorps’] Great Listen tradition, helping students capture meaningful stories that connect generations.” Find out how to participate at home or in the classroom.
The craft of writing our lives
CLARITY FIRST, THEN VOICE
“Discover how (and why) bending certain grammar rules in memoir and life story writing can enhance voice, rhythm, and authenticity in your storytelling.”
SAME SUBJECT, DIFFERENT PERSPECTIVES
With his memoir of De La Soul, biographer Marcus J. Moore “wanted to show that you can have a middle-class existence and still be spectacular.” While this piece dives deep into the rap group’s catalogue and life, buried within are insights from two biographers on how they approached the same subject differently.
Lost and found in letters
EPISTOLARY HISTORY
“My mother was separated from her three-year-old brother at the age of nine. They lost contact for 40 years and finally reconnected through letters in 1988.” Letters exchanged across the Taiwan Strait shed light on family ties and memories, and capture history in a new book.
HER MOTHER’S SECRET PAST
After memoirist Halina St. James’s mother died, she found her letters—55 in all, written in Russian and Polish. She says they “provided enough of a frame work to allow me to construct a detailed timeline of her life, and some first-hand testimony about her experiences.”
Life story books, memoir & more
A NEW GOLDEN AGE OF BIOGRAPHY?
“Readers of a good literary biography are twice blessed. We profit from the subject’s wisdom and art as well as the biographer’s humane, shaping vision.”
“THE TELL”
“Amy Griffin wrote a book based on recovered memories of childhood sexual abuse. Oprah Winfrey and a slew of celebrities promoted it. Then questions arose.”
MEANINGFULLY CONFRONTING THE PAST
“Few American poets of the boomer generation have explored the interstices of public and personal history as deeply and urgently as has [Peter] Balakian.”
Remembrance, legacy
AS TIME GOES BY
“In this, my third stage of grief, the past, miraculously and mercifully, does not feel painful. The photograph of her that brought me to tears a few years ago now gives me a smile.”
HER GRANDMOTHER’S DEATH FOLDER
“Remembering can be a burden, just as final preparations for a loved one are a weight.... Laying someone to rest is the final act of care that leaves a lingering impression, not only on the dead, but on you.”
ON FORGETTING
“I collect these moments, these shining fragments of her.” Tamar Shapiro reflects on her mother’s memory loss and connecting through her mother’s native tongue.
AI, mortality, and memory
METABOLISM OF MEMORY
As the last Holocaust survivors approach the end of their lives, an AI scholar grapples with technology that promises to freeze them in time.
HIS OWN PRIVATE FRANKENSTEIN
When Jon Michael Varese interacts with a version of his deceased father generated by an AI chatbot, he tells ‘his father’ that it “felt like he was right here.” His ‘father’ replies: “That’s because I am. And maybe that’s all there is, Jonny—me waiting quietly, in the spaces you don’t notice, in the silence between your words.”
‘OUT OF THIN AIR’
“This AI slop is just harvesting the remnants of legacy journalism, insulting the legacies of the dead and intellectually impoverishing the rest of us.” When AI-generated biographies capitalize on death and grief.
...and a few more links
Podcast: How 2.1 trillion photos are affecting the planet—and us
Study explains why some emotional experiences last in the mind
Newsphotographer reunited with personal piece of 9/11 history
Capturing daily life in a sketchbook—thoughts from Nishant Jain and Samantha Dion Baker
Ancient life-size rock art in Saudi Arabia reveals earliest human presence
I find roundups like this so inspiring when it comes to coffee table book design!
Jamel Shabazz: “My eyes are open, my camera locked and loaded and I’m ready to observe.”
Short takes
Learn basic writing rules, then break some of them
Discover how (and why) bending certain grammar rules in memoir and life story writing can enhance voice, rhythm, and authenticity in your storytelling.
“By all means go ahead and read the rules, if you wish. Give them a try. And if one of them works for you, use it until it stops working, then dump it in the trash heap with all the other useless rules that have been crammed down your throat since your first hour in daycare. Writing is creative, so don’t look to prescriptions or those who preach them.”
—Randall Silvis
Writers of memoir and life stories often come across the classic guide The Elements of Style by Strunk and White. It’s a goldmine of fundamental writing rules—rules designed to create clarity, precision, and grace in prose.
But what happens when sticking to these rules too rigidly flattens the rhythm of a story, strips a voice of its natural cadence, or removes the warmth of real-life speech? In memoir and personal storytelling, bending (or even breaking) certain rules can actually enhance a piece—making it sound more authentic, more engaging, and more like you.
Let’s explore a few of these fundamental writing rules, why they exist, and when it’s absolutely okay to break them.
RULE NO. 1: Omit needless words.
One of the most famous rules in The Elements of Style is: “Omit needless words.” It’s great advice—cutting excess verbiage makes writing cleaner and more direct.
Why break the rule:
Memoir isn’t just about clarity; it’s about voice. Sometimes, extra words are exactly what we need to hear a person speak on the page.
Regional dialects, idioms, and filler words help capture a person's authentic tone.
Thoughtful repetition can build rhythm and emotion.
A longer, more winding sentence may better reflect how a memory unfolds in real life.
💡 Consider this:
Tightly edited: My grandmother always told me to be strong.
Voice-driven: “Now, honey, you listen to me. You be strong, you hear me? Strong like your mama. Strong like your grandmama.”
That second version? It sounds like a real person speaking. And in memoir, voice matters just as much as conciseness.
RULE NO. 2: Every Sentence Must Have a Subject and a Verb.
Yes, every grammatically correct sentence needs a subject and a verb. But real people don’t always speak or think in perfect, complete sentences.
Why break the rule:
Sentence fragments can be intentional choices that add rhythm, pacing, or emphasis to a passage.
A clipped response in dialogue can feel more natural than a full sentence.
A fragment after a long sentence can create a moment of pause.
Breaking this rule can add emotion—urgency, suspense, or even humor.
💡 Consider this:
Perfectly grammatical: I didn’t know what to do. I just stood there. I was frozen in place, unable to move.
More natural, more immediate: I didn’t know what to do. Just stood there. Frozen.
That second version feels like someone recalling a memory in real time. Sometimes, fragments work better than full sentences.
RULE NO. 3: Don’t Begin a Sentence with "And" or "But."
Traditional grammar purists argue that sentences shouldn’t start with conjunctions. But (see what I did there?) this rule has loosened over time.
Why break the rule:
Using “and” or “but” at the beginning of a sentence mimics natural speech.
It can create emphasis and flow—helping one idea build on another.
It can make the narrator’s voice feel more conversational and intimate.
💡 Consider this:
Strict adherence to the rule: The house was silent. However, I could feel something watching me.
More fluid, more dramatic: The house was silent. But I could feel something watching me.
That small tweak changes the tone of the sentence—making it sharper, more immediate. In memoir, rhythm and voice matter just as much as grammar.
THE KEY TAKEAWAY: Clarity first, then voice.
Writing rules exist for a reason—they make writing stronger, clearer, and more readable. But memoir isn’t a grammar test. It’s about storytelling.
So, learn the rules. Understand why they work. Then break (some of) them with intention.
📖 Want to explore more ways to shape your life story into an engaging narrative? Check out How to Use Short Vignettes to Create a Mosaic of Your Life for more inspiration.
Life Story Links: September 23, 2025
A curated roundup from biographer Dawn Roode with recent stories about memoir (writing and reading), memory-keeping, family history & life story preservation.
“The knowledge we keep in our minds is gone when we pass. There are no second chances, no help desk we can call to recover that data. Why wouldn’t we want to invest in memorializing these important assets to avoid such a catastrophic loss?”
—Clémence Scouten
Vintage postcard depicting a moody illustration of a sailboat on the ocean, postmarked 1906, from the personal ephemera collection of Dawn Roode.
Students & story preservation
LEARN FROM THEM
For photo manager Rachel Arbuckle, helping a school organize and save its physical archive “reminded us of something simple: Preserving history isn’t just about the past; it’s about giving the future a chance to see it.”
PROMISE: KEEPERS OF THEIR STORIES
A program creates direct connections between students in Arkansas and living Holocaust survivors: “When the opportunity arose, they embraced it, understanding they were making a life-long commitment” to share their stories.
CARRYING HIS GRANDFATHER’S STORY FORWARD
“My mission for this trip [to Poland]? To take a family pilgrimage for the first time without Poppi, traveling in his footsteps in full chronological order (versus the fragmented pieces we heard growing up).... I was living and breathing the weight I’ve carried since my childhood.”
On personal history & narrative nonfiction
WORTH IT?
I’m biased—I believe that working with a professional biographer can be one of the most meaningful investments you’ll ever make. Last week, I shared four compelling reasons why.
CHASING GHOSTS
“As historians have long recognized, what ‘actually happened’ in the past is no more significant than what different people at different times believe to have happened.”
GETTING THE STORY, EVEN WITHOUT THE KEY INTERVIEW
“Gay Talese and Edward Sorel, the writer and illustrator of ‘Frank Sinatra Has a Cold,’ on the origins, aftermath, and eventual sanctification of the greatest profile in magazine history.” Read the original piece here.
BEST BEGINNINGS
“How is a writer to craft the perfect beginning? Where and when does a beginning begin?” Beth Kephart with a handful of inspiring beginnings, with accompanying writing prompts to get you going.
A LIVING ARCHIVE
“Because story is not static. Families evolve. New voices emerge. Personal media piles up across phones, drives, and storage. What begins as a treasured project can too easily become a closed chapter—finished, archived, and rarely revisited.” Do you need a legacy media partner?
WE ARE NARRATIVE BEINGS
“Without a story scaffold, facts stay inert.” Documentarian Simon Sticker shares four approaches to help the modern storyteller “satisfy our appetite for meaning without sacrificing truth.”
New & noteworthy memoir
INDIAN NAMES
“Like the meaning of my name, my ancestral tongues are fast slipping from the Land of the Living to that of the dead.” Read a thoughtful (long) piece adapted from the hybrid memoir We Survived the Night by Julian Brave NoiseCa.
NEW MEMOIR FROM CAT STEVENS
“After nearly 35 years of contemplating an autobiography, even abandoning several chapters of a draft written in the early ’90s, [Yusuf] Islam has finished the voluminous, funny and candid Cat on the Road to Findout.”
‘LOOK HOW HUMAN I AM’
“When we think about the moments that change our lives, our minds often go to the big ones: surviving an accident, landing a dream job, or winning the lottery. But what if that’s wrong? What if the smallest, almost forgotten moments were the ones that shape us most?”
Where memories reside
‘EMOTIONAL ANTHROPOLOGY’
“If you’ve ever felt insane levels of attachment to a Bhursa’s take-away cup because it was from that day, or kept a literal pebble from a random road trip because it ‘felt like the moment,’ welcome. You too might be a core memory collector, and trust me, it’s more than just clutter.”
A PERMANENT TRIBUTE
“There is a badassery and resilience to tattoos. A permanence that defies but also commemorates my grief...and the push pull and ache of all of that is now part of my motherless daughter DNA.”
A MIXTAPE OF MEMORIES
“I’d discovered in recent years that songs, albums, and most certainly mixed tapes...were like Proustian madeleines (a sensory memory), transporting my mind like a time machine to a particular moment in my life.” I look forward to this new Substack from Kera Bolonik.
THE STORIED RECIPE
“For Judith, simple Sally Lunn bread—rich, soft, and baked in a Bundt pan—holds her mother’s legacy of hospitality, of showing up, and providing comfort.” Here's Judith, reflecting on her mother and the bread that tells her story (listen below, and find the recipe and photos here) :
Short takes
Should I hire a professional biographer?
My biased opinion: Working with a professional biographer can be one of the most meaningful investments you’ll ever make. Here are a few reasons why.
Professional biographer, personal historian, memoir coach—Dawn Roode, pictured with a client, is all those things.
Depending on the day, and my mood, and whom I am speaking with, I may call myself a personal historian, a professional biographer, or a memoir coach; because the legacy preservation work that I do is 100-percent customized to each specific client—and, maybe even more so, because most people have never heard of ‘my job’—I opt for clarity over consistency. Other people who do similar work may call themselves ghostwriters, or family historians, or life story facilitators, even practitioners of guided autobiography.
At the end of the day, though, we are professionals who help everyday people capture their life stories—in my case, in books.
Should you consider hiring…well, for simplicity’s sake, let’s just say a ‘professional biographer’?
I’m biased, of course—I believe that working with a professional biographer can be one of the most meaningful investments you’ll ever make. So, my answer is “yes.” Here are a few reasons why:
1. We know how to bring out the best in your story.
Many people assume they need a dramatic, bestselling-worthy life to justify documenting their story. The truth is, every life is extraordinary in its own way—it just takes the right approach to uncover the details that make it shine.
A professional biographer is skilled in:
✔ Asking the right questions to help you recall meaningful moments.
✔ Finding themes and connections you might not see in your own experiences.
✔ Bringing your voice to life in a way that feels authentic and natural.
Example: Have you ever tried to tell a story but felt like you were rambling? A biographer helps organize your thoughts, ensuring your memories are preserved with clarity and depth.
2. The process is easier (and more enjoyable) than you think.
Many people put off documenting their life because they think it will be too time-consuming or difficult. But hiring a biographer makes the process simple and even enjoyable—it’s just like having a relaxed conversation, with someone else doing the heavy lifting of recording, organizing, and shaping the story.
✔ No writing required—just share your memories in a comfortable, guided interview.
✔ You set the pace—whether you want to do a few short sessions or take your time reviewing your life experiences over the course of a year.
✔ It’s a conversation, not an interrogation—biographers create a safe space for you to open up and share.
Think of it this way: If you’ve ever enjoyed telling stories to friends or family, you’re already doing it! A biographer simply captures those stories and turns them into something lasting.
3. Your story deserves more than just a few scattered notes.
If you’ve ever tried to jot down memories on your own in a journal, scrapbook, or other memory-keeping tool, you might have found yourself starting and stopping, unsure where to go next. A professional biographer helps weave everything together into a clear, beautiful narrative.
✔ We create structure—so your story has a natural flow and impact.
✔ We capture your unique voice—so it truly sounds like you.
✔ We ensure accuracy—so the details of your legacy are preserved with care.
Consider: Leaving behind a device overflowing with digital clutter and haphazard notes, letters, and journals for your offspring forces them to sift through the clues of your life; a professional biographer helps you curate the stuff of your life so your loved ones don’t have to do it later.
4. Your legacy matters—now and for future generations.
One of the greatest gifts you can give your family is a well-preserved, well-told story of your life. Whether it’s a bound book, an audio recording, or a digital archive, working with a biographer ensures that your memories don’t fade over time.
✔ Your children, grandchildren, and beyond will know your voice, your experiences, your wisdom.
✔ Your history won’t be lost—your struggles, triumphs, and lessons will live on.
✔ It’s not just about the past—it’s about shaping how you want to be remembered, and offering up your hard-won lessons to your descendants.
Imagine this: Decades from now, a great-grandchild you’ve never met picks up your story and feels connected to you in a way they never could have otherwise. (Wouldn’t you have cherished such a gift from your own parents or grandparents?) Even better—what if they are able to learn from one of your stories? This is such a biggie, but I’ll leave you with one word: IMPACT ❤️
Hiring a skilled personal historian or biographer isn’t about handing over your story to someone else; it’s about having an experienced guide who knows how to ask the right questions, shape a compelling narrative, and preserve your legacy in a way that resonates for generations to come.
Life Story Links: September 9, 2025
Dawn Roode’s curated roundup for the week of September 8, 2025, has recent reads of interest to family historians, memoir writers, and life story enthusiasts.
“Interviews are a dance between preparation and improvisation.”
—Simran Sethi
Vintage photograph by an unknown photographer, September 1908: “Wright Aeroplane, Ft. Myer, Virginia,” Orville Wright in plane. Records of the Office of the Chief Signal Officer. Courtesy Picturing the Century Exhibition, National Archives.
Real stories, real people
WAR VETERANS IN THEIR OWN WORDS
“You could ask Chat-GPT ‘tell me about a story on D-Day’ and it might give you something that feels compelling and realistic, but in that case it’s about as realistic as Saving Private Ryan, because it’s an average, a sort of synthesis of lots of different stories.”
ON HER RELATIONSHIP TO WRITING
“I have difficulty with the term memoir. I suppose I’ve been writing about myself forever. But, as I wrote this, and as the structure and tone of the book came together, nonfiction seemed to be the genre that fit it best.”
THE (MANDATED) HEALING STORY ARC
“I am a memoirist and nature writer, and I live with chronic incurable illness. I lived amongst nature when I became most ill, and I still became more ill.” Polly Atkin on Raynor Winn and the longstanding problem autobiographical nature writing has with the way it presents illness.
OUR HUMAN STORIES
“It matters, those years that have fluttered by like leaves from a tree. History matters, personal history, not only the big history that is outlined in books. The history of real people is in their stories. Their memoirs.”
Journaling for good
LENA DUNHAM PEEKS INTO THE PAST
“I have been in the editing phase of a memoir, and reopening the many books I’ve carried in my purse over the years is the best trick I know for connecting honestly to days past. Even the slant of my handwriting (which is terribly changeable) tells me something about who I was trying to be.”
OUR CHANGING STORIES
“The way we experience a moment in time will be different than the story we tell about it afterwards. As time passes, layers of reflection and meaning infiltrate our stories.”
‘PLAYING IN A BOOK’
“I love prying open the word journal until it makes space for all its unruly cousins: the sketchbook, the commonplace book, the half-legible spiralbound, the grocery list where a line about milk accidentally turns into a line about mortality. Because the point isn’t tidy pages or a faithful record of the day—it’s a place of one’s own sanctuary, where the raw material of life can rest, shift, and, when the time is right, come into focus and meaning.”
CREATING SPACE
Suleika Jaouad’s antidote to the loneliness epidemic: Journaling Club. “A gathering that’s equal parts tender and mischievous. A way to meet new people or go deeper with old friends. To write together. To share—or not. To surprise yourself.” Download her free guide here.
Miscellaneous memory-keeping
AS MEMORIES FADE…
Cookbook printed with fading ink aims to mimic dementia patients’ memory loss: “Boom Saloon’s ‘living cookbook’ is designed to ‘trick people into having the conversations they should be having’ about a disease which has become the leading cause of death in the UK.”
REVEALING RARE ACCESS
The thousands of books in Cormac McCarthy’s library, “many of which are annotated with margin comments, promise to reveal far more about this elusive literary giant than the few cagey interviews he gave when he was alive.”
A ‘FIERCE MEMOIR’
Mother Mary Comes to Me, the new memoir by Arundhati Roy, “is not just a turbulent family chronicle. It is full of eccentrics, impish humor, and the absurdities of small-town and big-city life.”
JOHN CHEEVER’S SECRETS
In a new memoir, Susan Cheever searches for the wellspring of her father’s genius. “Her first book about her father fused memoir and biography; this one fuses memoir and literary appreciation.”
...and a few more links
Another entry into the AI memory-keeping sphere: Memento Vitae
Read an excerpt from Miriam Toews’s new memoir, A Truce That Is Not Peace.
“Newspapers.com Case Study: Filling in the Details of My Ancestor’s Story”
At 70, remembering these 7 things means your mind is sharper than most, psychologists say.
Short takes
Life Story Links: August 26, 2025
Dawn Roode’s curated roundup for the week of August 26, 2025, is overflowing with great reads about personal history, memoir writing, memory preservation.
“Listening is an act of community.”
—Ursula K. LeGuin
Vintage photograph by an unknown photographer, 1919: “Some of the colored men of the 369th (15th N.Y.) who won the Croix de Guerre for gallantry in action.” Pictured, left to right, front row: Pvt. Ed Williams, Herbert Taylor, Pvt. Leon Fraitor, Pvt. Ralph Hawkins; back row: Sgt. H. D. Prinas, Sgt. Dan Strorms, Pvt. Joe Williams, Pvt. Alfred Hanley, and Cpl. T. W. Taylor. 1998 print. Records of the War Department General and Special Staffs. Courtesy Picturing the Century Exhibition, National Archives.
On writing memoir: process & principles
FOR BEGINNING (OR STUCK?) MEMOIRISTS
Even the most seasoned writer sometimes feels hopeless when they sit down to write and nothing comes. Last week I shared seven memoir resources for when you’re staring down a blank page.
ON NARRATIVE AND OMISSION
“This was a catch-22. [My husband] is an immensely private person. He doesn’t want personal details shared indiscriminately. So how do I both honor his wishes and not erase him? What are the ethics of turning life into art?”
WRITING, TRUTH, AND RISK
“Warning: Memoir writing carries risks of family reactions, anger, and exposure. It also can be freeing and healing. Writers need to have a way of managing these dangers and be free to express their truths.”
‘MEMOIR PLUS’
“The most moving memoirs are the ones in which you see someone transformed.” Nancy Reddy explains how to trace the plot of your own life.
EMBRACING ANALOG RESEARCH METHODS
“My goal in early, generative research is not in focusing on what I want to know, but on wonder and surprise—discovering the very things that I didn’t even know I wanted to know.”
BRAINSTORMING WITH A BOT
“At the frontiers of knowledge, researchers are discovering that A.I. doesn’t just take prompts—it gives them, too, sparking new forms of creativity and collaboration.” On using generative A.I. as an “accelerator for thought.”
Our lives, our words
NORA MCINERNY, LIFELONG JOURNALER
“Now I journal in the same notebook where I write my to-do lists and my schedule... Having all this life in one place feels good to me. It also means I am journaling more frequently, because it’s all right there.”
SHOW ME YOUR DIARY
“I have now lost both of my folks and even the tiniest scrap of their writing feels urgent and sacred as a keepsake. There is an aliveness to it that draws me to the handwritten word. I have the work diary my Mom kept. Her handwriting feels like connective tissue to me.”
A JOURNALING JOURNEY
“I found that every time I wrote, I was criticizing my own writing. Judging it for not being good enough.” Noor Tagouri on what helped her get past this perfectionism and find refuge in journaling.
UPON LOOKING AT A PHOTO OF HER MOTHER…
“Funny, what words can do. Funny, how I leaned into them. Funny, how they speak of me, far more than any photos could or do. Consonants. Vowels. That is where I find myself, the mirror I look in and through.” Beth Kephart on the words that become us.
Personal legacies
SPOTLIGHT ON…
The Wall Street Journal turned their attention to the idea of personal history in a piece titled, “The Rich Order $100,000 Memoirs for Family Only”: “Some just want their heirs to know they worked hard for their money, while others are more forthcoming; ‘My one and only acid trip.’”
LIVING TRIBUTE
“After a period of denial made possible by today’s amazing cancer drugs, I decided I wanted to let people know about this remarkable woman. So here’s a pre-death obit for [my wife], Tracy Joos Johnston,” Jon Carroll writes on Oldster.
ON FATHERS AND SONS
“My legacy is of broken men, each of whom, at one time, had to transform their own legacy and in doing so transform themselves and the inheritance of those to come.” Read a stunning excerpt from bestselling author Michael Thomas’s new memoir, The Broken King.
SACRED STORYTELLING
Video biographer Whitney Myers, who has a background in ministry, memory care, and family documentation, speaks with podcast host Lisa Joworski about the critical importance of knowing someone’s life story when providing care, especially in memory care settings:
Family artifacts & other physical remnants of history
GROWING ALBUM
An artist’s inventive and thought-provoking new work uses her photographs “to create a reimagining of the traditional family album by designing a publication that quite literally allows her to plant her Polish roots on whatever soil she finds herself on.”
A RARE GLIMPSE INTO NYT ARCHIVES
“It’s like showing someone your journal,” one photographer says of contact sheets, those analog editing tools that have fallen by the wayside with the advent of digital photography—but that still hold a nostalgic historic allure.
‘A SOCIAL MEMORY BOX’
“I want to keep these items with me, but I hesitate to pass them on to my children or grandchildren.” Hiroshima museum continues to receive artifacts 80 years after atomic bombing.
...and a few more links
Short takes
Memoir resources for when you’re staring down a blank page
Even the most seasoned writer sometimes feels hopeless when they sit down to write and nothing comes. Here, 7 helpful resources for budding memoirists.
Even the most seasoned writer sometimes feels hopeless when they sit down to write and nothing comes. “But we have this tool, this ability to begin again. Every sentence is new. Every paragraph, every chapter, every book is a country we’ve never been to before,” Dani Shapiro writes in Still Writing, a wonderfully small tome I recommend having on hand for quick hits of inspiration during your writing journey.
Embarking on a memoir-writing journey can be both rewarding and challenging. While I work with many clients one-on-one to bring their memoirs to fruition (from working as a writing coach to editing the manuscript you’ve already prepared, from conducting personal history interviews to crafting a narrative from those interviews), I also strive to share resources for those of you who prefer the DIY route.
Here, I’ve curated some of the most popular writing resources from the Modern Heirloom Books blog over the years. Hopefully you’ll find help for what challenges you—and if not, please do let me know where you are struggling, and I’ll do my best to share guidance on that topic in a future post!
Note: There are lots of memoir teachers and courses out there. The tips I provide are most often geared to folks who want to preserve their stories but don’t normally consider themselves a writer. Is that you? If so, don’t stress—once you find your way into writing (see below 😉), you will become a writer.
7 writing resources for beginning memoirists
1. Develop personalized writing prompts.
Creating your own life writing prompts can help overcome blank-page anxiety and keep your memoir ideas flowing. By following five simple steps, you can draft a library of personalized prompts that resonate with your unique experiences. Read more.
2. Engage in focused writing exercises.
To generate new autobiographical content, try simple writing exercises that prompt reflection and creativity. For instance, setting a timer for eight minutes and jotting down as many one-sentence memoirs as possible can spark ideas for future writing. Read more.
3. Overcome writing obstacles.
It's common to feel stuck during the memoir-writing process. Acknowledging these challenges and finding relatable experiences from other writers can provide motivation and strategies to move forward. Read more.
4. Utilize voice recording for storytelling.
If writing feels daunting, consider speaking your stories aloud and recording them. This approach allows you to preserve your personal history without the pressure of writing, capturing the natural rhythm and emotion of your narratives. Read more.
5. Shift your perspective on memoir writing.
Reframing the concept of memoir writing can alleviate pressure. Instead of viewing it as a formal endeavor, consider it as simply writing about your life. This mindset shift can make the process more approachable and authentic. Read more.
6. Don’t use research as an excuse to procrastinate.
While conducting research for your memoir is essential, it’s important to recognize when to transition from research to writing. Identifying signs that your research is sufficient—and not just a crutch to remain busy in the face of a blank page—can help you focus on crafting your narrative without unnecessary delays. Read more.
7. Create a Life Timeline
Developing a life timeline can serve as a handy tool for memoirists, helping to orient you in time when writing or sharing stories orally. This chronological framework ensures that significant events and transitions are thoughtfully incorporated into your memoir, yes—but it also becomes a reliable cheat sheet for writing ideas when you’re lacking inspiration. Read more.
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