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Conjuring epiphanies
A wistful look at how my affinity for epiphanies led me to become the founder of Modern Heirloom Books—and how “moments of being” transform our heirloom books.
Every Modern Heirloom Book tells a story. Biographical, but not a biography; memoir-like, but not a memoir. Rather, a poetic narrative and photo arc that hones in on experiences and emotions, beauty, and memory. A story that makes you feel, and that invites your loved ones to remember with you.
Before deciding to call this company by the descriptive name Modern Heirloom, I strongly considered Epiphany Books. While I clearly left that name in the dust, the background behind it is telling, and encapsulates my approach to creating personalized treasures especially for you. So for our blog today, a little #ThrowbackThursday look at how my affinity for epiphanies led me to become the founder of Modern Heirloom Books.
noun epiph·a·ny \i-ˈpi-fə-nē\
a (1) : a usually sudden manifestation or perception of the essential nature or meaning of something (2) : an intuitive grasp of reality through something (as an event) usually simple and striking (3) : an illuminating discovery, realization, or disclosure
b : a revealing scene or moment [Merriam Webster]
c : “moments of being” [Virginia Woolf]
How “Moments of Being” Transform our Books
I have had little epiphanies my whole life—moments when something profound has seemed crystalline. A glimpse of the meaning of life while rounding the corner in downtown Manhattan. A whisper of some long-forgotten truth while showering.
But by their very nature epiphanies are fleeting. I could never fully grasp what I had known in those moments, no less articulate it for another. Yet I was better for having experienced them.
Memories can come to us in similar ways—conjured by a smell, the glance of a stranger on the street. And they can disappear as quickly.
The books we create from your own life material, like poetry, give physical form to memory. In the hopes that you—and those who come after you—may continue to have “moments of being.”
My Own Personal Epiphany
I relished working in the magazine industry for more than 20 years. My experience at some of the world’s top fashion and lifestyle titles helped me cultivate a keen eye for beautiful detail, an ear for an exquisite phrase. I honed my ability to edit and curate. I told stories to the masses.
As the publishing landscape evolved, so did our way of consuming our own personal media.
More than 200,000 photos are uploaded to Facebook every minute. We shoot everything from what we eat to makeup-free selfies daily. Our pictures are everywhere; and they are nowhere. Never have we needed editors more than now.
And, somewhere along the line, I had a personal epiphany: I wanted to help tell stories, but no longer on a mass scale—I wanted to help you tell your story. Beautifully, professionally, meaningfully. Uniquely.
Related Reading
The Next Chapter in Our Story
I recount my journey from national magazines to bespoke life story books, and introduce a new signature product line of books.
a tendency towards nostalgia
Rediscovering an old family photo album in my closet prompted me to reflect on the lasting appeal & transformative power of nostalgia.
Is digital story sharing for you?
Want to record family stories? “There’s an app for that!” Undoubtedly, there is—but which one is right for you? My top picks for digital story sharing services
Want to record family stories? “There’s an app for that!” Undoubtedly, there is—but will you use it, or will it sit unopened on the last page of your device’s scroll?
If you and your family members are more inclined to take action with tech tools as opposed to pen and paper, here are my top picks for digital story sharing services:
StoryWorth
Who it’s right for:
Connected grandparents, multi-generational families separated by distance
How it works:
With a StoryWorth subscription, users are emailed once a week with prompts to answer a question based on their life experiences. The array of questions is vast and evocative, though users may always choose to answer a question they themselves craft.
Pros:
When a reply is input, answers are emailed to a preset list of people—so, as many family members and friends as you want to designate may receive your stories.
It’s a lot easier to type than it is to write things out longhand (remember those days?!), so users are more likely to get into a rhythm answering questions regularly online than they might otherwise be with an old-fashioned memory-prompt journal.
For individuals who may not have a computer or email address, or for whom typing may be difficult, StoryWorth also offers an audio plan with stories recorded over the phone (some restrictions apply).
Cons:
At the end of the year StoryWorth automatically crafts a black-and-white book of memories based on the subscriber’s responses—and while that’s great in theory (I’m all about preserving memories in a book, after all), there is no room for editing, personalization, or revision.
Also check out:
Two similar apps that are still in beta but look promising are Life Mapping (which “maps” your path through life) and iRememba (leave your legacy via “digital time capsules”).
Family Search Memories App
who it’s right for:
Genealogy fans & family historians
how it works:
Your family historian may already be registered on Family Search, but are they familiar with the Memories features? Users may upload photos, stories, documents, and audio recordings that add depth to the names on their family tree.
The Family Search Memories app displays stories in a gallery view, as shown, or in a list view to make finding specific entries easier.
pros:
The Family Search Memories app allows you to capture priceless family moments through photos and voice recordings on your phone, even when you don't have Internet access.
Family history is truly brought to life—and promises to genuinely capture the next generation’s imagination—when pictures and details exist, not just data and documents.
cons:
While FamilySearch vows to “store your precious moments free forever,” the fact remains that it is a business, and businesses—especially tech businesses—can change (or cease to exist) over time. (Don’t let this app or “the Cloud” be your only means of storing your photos and stories, please.)
Regular Old Email
WHO it’s right for:
The less tech-savvy elders in your family, or those who might prefer to write but are hampered by arthritis or other physical debilitations
how it works:
The art of letter-writing may be dead, but that doesn’t mean long-term correspondence need be, as well. Begin a regular correspondence with a loved one that goes beyond cat memes and dinner dates: Set some ground rules (“let’s explore your past, Mom,” or “I’d love to know more about your college and war years, Dad”) and timeline (at least once per week, perhaps) and start sharing notes.
I was especially inspired by journalist Anderson Cooper, who undertook a year-long extended email conversation with his mother that resulted in a book—and that tapped into, as Cooper said, “not the mundane details, but the things that really matter, her experiences that I didn’t know about or fully understand…”
pros:
No subscription or monetary commitment is necessary. All you need is an email address and access to a computer (available at most local libraries if one is not accessible at home).
It can be easier to delve into difficult or emotional topics when not face-to-face with a loved one. And since correspondents may take some time to review what they have typed, they can be thoughtful about their story sharing.
We have become accustomed to typing, and can pour out our thoughts much more quickly than if we were writing on paper—so conversations may go longer, deeper, more quickly.
cons:
There is a disconnect when reading rather than hearing, and tone or inflection is lost on a screen. Participants must get to know one another’s writing style—and understand that sometimes an actual conversation should ensue to clear up any confusion or hurt feelings.
You may accrue a wonderful catalog of communications through an email correspondence, but the onus is on you to do something to preserve what you have gathered. Don’t let the stories—and the love and understanding that ensues—languish; contact us to help you turn your memories into an heirloom book, or consider simply printing them out (with dates) for the next generation to read and learn from.
5 Heirloom book ideas
Do you want to preserve your family stories, but have no idea where to start? We’ve got six special life story book ideas to spark your imagination.
Your legacy is your most precious family heirloom. Yet preserving the experiences and lessons that constitute that legacy can seem like a daunting undertaking—where to begin, which stories to tell?
If you want to preserve your family stories, but have no idea where to start, we’ve got five special life story book ideas to spark your imagination.
An heirloom book capturing the memories of one woman’s years spent in Greece, and her decision to return stateside with her newborn daughter. Remember—you don’t have to tell your whole life story. Pick a transformative experience from your life and tell that one story well!
1 - A Taste of the Past
Celebrate recipes that have been passed down through generations in a bespoke book that weaves your family’s cherished food memories with nostalgic photographs and handwritten recipes. Modern Heirloom Books’ secret ingredient to creating the perfect custom “cookbook”? Bringing the stories behind the food to life, so you’ll feel like you’re right back in Nonna’s anise-scented kitchen!
2 - Dear Daughter, on Your Wedding Day
One of our most popular signature products, this blue silk–covered gem is the surprise gift guaranteed to make your bride cry tears of joy on her wedding day! A book that looks back on the milestones of her life, from her baby years to her graduation, from her first words spoken to those you would like to share with her about her future...a book that will put the meaning back into the wedding planning process for you, her parents; and that she, on the cusp of the next chapter of her life, will cherish forever.
3 - A Life Well-Lived
Bring a family elder’s colorful stories to life in ways your children—and eventually their children—will want to revisit again and again. Through interviews, letters, and photographs, your loved one’s memories and wisdom will be captured in a bespoke book that will become your most cherished heirloom. Whose stories will you tell?
4 - Places in the Heart
Does your family vacation at the same Hamptons beach house or cabin in Maine every year? Has your home been passed down through generations and have its own story to tell? Maybe your kids are attending the sleep-away camp you did as a child—or they’re following in your college footsteps. This book makes your favorite place the central character and gives meaning to the phrase, “If these walls could talk…”
5 - Voyager
"The world is a book, and those who do not travel read only one page." You, dear traveler, are absorbing the world one trip at a time, discovering, experiencing, learning... Wherever your journeys take you (an African safari? The Maldives? the glaciers of Alaska?), our travel books help you not only remember the places, but relive the moments—and 'travel' back there from the comfort of your home.
The Possibilities are endless.
Hopefully the five sample books give you a sense of how to frame a story—how to thematically explore your memories so the resulting book truly becomes an heirloom worthy of your legacy. But remember, you don’t have to know how to proceed: That’s our job. With more than two decades’ worth of editorial experience, our specialty is transforming your stories from raw material into heirlooms.
What memories make you smile? What decisions from your lifetime put you—and your family—on an entirely new path? What lessons has your experience imparted that hold value for the next generation?
When we begin to explore those questions, we begin to hone in on the stories that are most important for you to preserve. Would you like to begin that conversation? I promise, once we begin, you won’t want to stop…
The investment for most Modern Heirloom Books starts at $7,000, with the exception of our tribute books, which start at $1,750. Lead times vary based upon the nature of the book, typically taking from three to 12 months to complete.
This post has been updated on October 21, 2025, to reflect the removal of one of our early products, the One-Hour Heirloom.
75 Questions to spark Christmas story sharing
Family history questions for Christmas: 75 open-ended, specific interview questions to elicit powerful memories & stories from the older generation.
Christmas and Hanukkah—or other holidays where extended family gathers in one place—is an optimal time to gather stories and memories via oral history interviews. There needn't be a lot of pressure: Simply turn on your smart phone’s voice recorder or set up a video camera on a tripod, then forget it’s there...and begin reminiscing.
The important thing is that you relax and let the stories flow. Don’t wait until next year or when everyone is available or any other “better time”—trust me when I say: Now is always the right time!
When family gathers at Christmas, use the opportunity to share stories and memories of days gone by—trust me, it’s as entertaining as it is valuable!
Personal history interview questions: Christmas edition
Use these questions merely as a guide or to give you ideas for questions of your own. The key to any good personal history interview is listening—so ask follow-up questions that genuinely interest you, and let the stories take their own paths...that is usually when the magic ensues!
FOOD
Is there a dish you always associate with Christmas Eve or Christmas day Do you know who has the recipe, and who originally cooked it for your family?
Did you or your family make cookies or other special desserts to share with neighbors during the holiday season? What about leaving food for Santa—and his reindeer?
Are there any foods, from the holiday season or year-round, that remind you of your heritage?
Did your parents make you eat anything you absolutely hated?
What food(s) do you associate with comfort? With the onset of winter?
Who made the cakes for birthdays in your home?
Do you recall any massive failures at cooking—a horrible dinner, burnt pie, missing ingredients?
Who taught you how to cook?
TRADITION
Did you hang Christmas stockings? By a fireplace, or somewhere else? Were they filled by Santa? Do you have any favorite memories of stocking stuffers?
Did anyone in your family or neighborhood dress up as Santa? Did you know it was them? Have you or anyone else in your family continued that tradition of playing Santa—and if so, how does it make you feel?
What traditions do you most fondly recall from your childhood?
Are there certain traditions that have persisted for generations in your family?
What traditions have you begun anew with your own nuclear family?
Is there a memorable gift you have given someone?
What is the best gift you have ever received?
ANTICIPATION
What time did you wake up on Christmas morning? Was it earlier than your parents? Did they make you wait before starting the festivities?
Do you recall the feeling of anticipation on Christmas Eve?
What other times in your life do you recall similar feelings of anticipation?
GIFTS
Did you (and your siblings/family members) want to rush through the gift giving? Was there a sense of order and gratitude opening gifts, or was it wrapping-paper mayhem?
Did you ever look for or find evidence of Santa?
Were there ever times when hardship made gift giving at the holidays challenging? How did that make you feel? Do you have a story from that time, or a lesson learned?
How were gifts wrapped?
Did you help pick out gifts for those you loved, or was it strictly a parent thing?
What types of gifts or cards can you recall having made by hand
as a child?
Do you remember how you felt when you discovered the truth about Santa? How old were you?
What is your most magical Christmas memory?
RELIGION
What religion, if any, is your family? Were you devout? Members of a congregation?
Was your church or temple community a central part of your life?
Did you go to church on Christmas morning? Midnight mass?
What memories of you have of those times?
Did/do you pray?
Are you spiritual? How does that manifest itself in your life?
HUGS
Was your family very affectionate? Describe how they showed love, or if you wished there was more physical affection.
Are you a hugger? How does it make you feel?
Who in your family gives/gave the best bear hugs? What is/was that person like?
Did you cuddle with your parents? Do you cuddle with your own children? Grandchildren? What does it mean to you?
Did you write letters to Santa? If so, where did you mail them? Did you ever hear back from the North Pole?
Do you recall getting Christmas cards during the holiday season?
Did your family draft a holiday letter (many people keep these as part of their family history archive—did you save any of them)?
SNOW
Where did you live when you were growing up? Did you generally have a white Christmas?
Do you remember the first time you saw snow?
What was your favorite snowtime activity—sledding (or did you have a toboggan?), making snow angels, snow balls fights? Or how about ice skating? Shoveling?
Do you recall snow days from school? Listening to the radio for announcements, or waiting for a parent to wake you up? How did you occupy yourself on snow days?
Did you build snowmen? What would you use for the nose and eyes?
HOME
What smells remind you of your childhood home?
What makes you feel most at home now, as an adult?
How do you describe home?
What was the address of your favorite home? Why was it your favorite?
Have you ever visited a home from long ago—how did it make you feel?
Did you move often while you were growing up? Did that affect your personality or self-esteem?
Free Christmas Questions Guide
Download all 75 questions in a handy printable booklet!
Give the most unique holiday gift!
Cherished memories last a lifetime—and beyond, if you preserve them.
Life Story Links: December 11, 2018
Fine examples of first-person storytelling to inspire your own life story writing, plus wisdom on reminiscence & a look at the legacy of Pearl Harbor survivors.
“I do not understand how memory works, I say, how we think we remember things that never happened and how we can forget the things that have. I want to know what I would find if I unspooled my memories and laid them out against my mother’s and my grandmother’s. I imagine the textures and seams of our competing recollections; I imagine them synthesizing to form a richer whole.”
—Crystal Hana Kim
1st Grade Twins on Swings, 1963. Photograph by Yale Joel for LIFE magazine. ©Time Inc.
First Person Reads
EATING TO AMERICA
“When I wanted to have a family just like everyone else’s I could slide into a booth at Pizza Hut and in the darkly lit restaurant my odd family could almost pass for a mom and a dad and two kids, and maybe even American ones, as long as we whispered,” writes Naz Riahi in this delicious read.
CUTS AND QUESTIONS
“He ran his hands through his hair inspecting just like he had inspected my sewing at age seven, my planting at age twelve, and my oil change at age fifteen,” writes Yollotl Lopez in her tribute to eight years of hair cutting—and loving ritual—with her father.
SCENES FROM A LIFE
In “The Proposal and the Purse,” personal historian Deborah Wilbrink relays scenes from an almost-relationship. Her first-person vignette, hosted on Sarah White’s True Stories Well Told site, is indicative of the type of writing Sarah teaches in her flash memoir classes.
Remembrance, Reminiscence & Legacy
CELEBRATING HANUKKAH WITH STORIES
“Unless people intentionally take the time to ask questions, we often don’t get to hear the stories of our elders,” says Rabbi Susan Goldberg, who designates Hanukkah as an optimal time to ask those questions.
PEARL HARBOR MEMORIAL
For the first time, there were no survivors of the USS Arizona at the annual ceremonies marking the December 7, 1941, attack on Pearl Harbor. “It wasn't the pages of a book—it was your life. It was your mother, your brother. It was your house going up in flames in bombings.” Memories that survivors have carried for so long live on in oral histories.
CONFERENCE TAKEAWAYS
In my latest post I share thoughts from the 2018 International Reminiscence & Life Review Conference including compelling anecdotal evidence on the value of reminiscence work, research challenges, and the shifting nature of autobiographical memory.
...and a Few More Links
The best reviewed memoirs and biographies of 2018
How millennial parents are reinventing the family photo album
“If you want to write a great book, hire a scribe.”
The StoryCatcher app has been updated.
Short Takes
“Nobody ever asked me before”
Thoughts from the 2018 International Reminiscence & Life Review Conference including research challenges, anecdotal evidence, and autobiographical memory.
Thoughts on Reminiscence and Life Review
I recently attended the 2018 International Reminiscence and Life Review Conference in Boston, where researchers and practitioners presented an abundance of new information, much of it evidence-based, about the value of life review.
And while the data is certainly thought-provoking, it was the personal (subjective) narratives of those in attendance that I found most inspiring—and reflective of my own experience.
The Limits of Reminiscence Research
I am not a medical or scientific researcher. I was impressed nonetheless with the efforts of researchers to quantify how reminiscence can help individuals with dementia or mild cognitive impairment, for instance, or patients with symptoms of depression.
At a time when one of the world’s largest pharmaceutical companies has halted research into finding new drugs to treat Alzheimer’s disease, more money is currently being spent to research the impact of reminiscence and life review on patients with mild dementia or cognitive impairment than any other non-pharmacological intervention, according to Pam Schweitzer, MBE, founder of the European Reminiscence Network.
Anecdotal evidence of reminiscence’s value mounts and flourishes and is shared at a conference such as this, and the circle of telling and recognition and telling of similar experiences is not only affirming, but exciting. Yet the overarching theme was how to find ways to conduct more effective randomized control trials that yield compelling results.
I will leave the studies and scientific quest for data to the experts (and follow their results with great anticipation!). In the meantime, I am heartened by their stories.
Wisdom, Takeaways & Tips from the Conference
There is power in the asking.
During a presentation chock-full of study names and journal links, what stayed with me days later was a five-word quote: “Nobody ever asked me before.”
In a 2004 paper describing her research into facilitating reminiscence and learning about the life experiences of older African-Americans, Juliette Shellman, Ph.D., APHN-BC, designated this as one of five major themes to emerge. “Nobody ever asked me before.”
In my mind, this quote could be attributed to any one of us—any age, any race, religion, or background. It is a recurring theme in my own work, and one of the reasons I find conducting personal history interviews so rewarding: Because once someone does ask, what comes forth from the subject is, well, everything.
I know the power of being a compassionate, open-hearted, and curious listener—do you? Try asking a loved one to tell you some of their story. What ensues will be as much a gift for them as it will be for you.
What helps spark memories in patients with dementia works as well with…everyone.
“Allow time, listen well, and reflect back what people say to encourage and support them,” Pam Schweitzer said.
“Speak slowly.” Be clear, and listen attentively.
“Use multi-sensory stimulation.” Show old photos, play favorite songs, spark memories through the senses, not just through spoken words.
Yes, these approaches are proven to help guide and support individuals with mild cognitive impairment on their journey of remembering, and we must be especially cognizant of them when conducting interviews with those individuals. Don’t forget, though: These techniques are effective, thankfully, with anyone.
Find tips for engaging in an informal life review interview here.
We all place a premium on our memories.
Most people intentionally create memory aids—scrapbooks or drawers filled with ticket stubs and souvenirs; diaries that chronicle our lives and search for meaning in our experiences. Our devices filled to brimming with family photos (often numbering in the thousands) are perhaps the clearest evidence of documenting our memories.
In today’s technological age, which kinds of memories are we documenting—and how accessible are they? Do these physical reminders (often lost in that long device scroll) extend or alter our autobiographical memory?
These questions were the basis of a lively discussion about how we regard, preserve, and honor our memories as they are catalogued on social media. Apps have proliferated in recent years to help us recollect all that we have posted and shared: The Museum of Me, My Social Book, and After Me among them.
Many of these apps mine personal data from Facebook, Instagram, and other social media platforms to create an (auto)biography. The idea sounds nice, but often the “memories” they present are a superficial, even distorted, representation of the self. Random memories from social media do not equal biography, nor do they, in my opinion, often aid in a search for meaning amidst our memories, for our social media is inherently biased toward positive experiences.
An automated biography is indeed not autobiography in the true sense.
The questions that will continue to interest me are: How do our digital and internal memories interact with one another? Does taking a picture interfere with the quality of an individual memory?
And, as a personal historian, editor, and memory-keeper myself, I will always regard memories as most meaningful when they lead to contemplation. Reminiscence in the truest sense should help us clarify our thinking about the turning points in our life, and enrich the meaning of our life story.
Social media will continue to provides us with important touchstones in our memory-keeping. And all these apps that aim (not always successfully) to “curate” our memories and create a “legacy,” if nothing else, prove to me that collectively, we yearn for reminders of our past and value our memories.
But when it comes to creating—telling, writing, sharing—our life stories, personal reminiscence and curation is still the gold standard.
Related Reading
Efficacy of life review and reminiscence interventions for different target groups, and successful intervention methods, per a 2006 research study
An introduction to narrative medicine: How stories nourish empathy
Life Story Links: November 27, 2018
Louis Armstrong’s personal archives, WWI stories passed through generations, and plenty of process talk including using Scrivener and reviving stalled memoirs.
“We all practice the craft of autobiography in our inner conversations with ourselves about the meaning of our experience, and those conversations, no matter what language we use, are fundamentally theological or philosophical. Though only a handful of us set about writing down the results and publishing them for others to read, we are all autobiographers.”
—Jill Ker Conway
Louis Armstrong and his wife Lucille in the den of their Corona, Queens, New York home; the jazz legend’s archives are now available online. PHOTO courtesy of Louis Armstrong Archive.
Stories Worth Sharing
LOUIS ARMSTRONG ARCHIVES
From handwritten playlists of his musical inspiration to scrapbooks of his life as it was lived (and as it was recorded in the newspapers), Louis Armstrong was a careful (and thorough) documentarian of his life. Now the full archives are accessible online.
VETERANS’ STORIES
In “The War Stories Their Families Never Forgot,” the New York Times collects memories of readers’ relatives who had a role in World War I—and the submissions are, unexpectedly, often uplifting.
THE ATTIC OF HISTORY
Sir Peter Jackson says he would be happy if his new war film inspires people to go rummaging around in their attics for old photos and letters, keen to piece together tales about grandfathers and ancient uncles who served in the first World War.
On People and Process
“TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF”
Terry Gross, considered by many to be a master interviewer, offers insights into how to talk to people. “As an interviewer, Ms. Gross’s goal is to find out how her subject became who they are; as a conversationalist, make that goal your own.”
SYSTEM TALK
In her latest podcast episode, Amy Woods Butler, aka The Life Story Coach, describes how she goes from interview transcript to book draft, including how Scrivener fits into her process.
A PROFESSIONAL’S PERSPECTIVE
About half Nancy West’s memoir clients are people who previously attempted writing their memoirs themselves. “They bogged down in telling very specific stories perfectly and comprehensively,” she says, “whereas I work like a journalist: facts first, then flesh it out.”
...and a Few More Links
Is deleting Facebook deleting your memories?
Ann Curry’s We’ll Meet Again returns to television.
Mickey Mouse gets the “life story” treatment on his 90th birthday.
New study shows our brains prioritize memories that are useful in making future decisions.
Short Takes
55 Questions to spark Thanksgiving story sharing
Family history questions for Thanksgiving: 55 open-ended, specific interview questions to elicit powerful memories & stories from the older generation.
Thanksgiving—or other holidays where extended family gathers in one place—is an optimal time to gather stories and memories via oral history interviews. There needn't be a lot of pressure: Simply turn on your smart phone’s voice recorder or set up a video camera on a tripod, then forget it’s there...and begin reminiscing.
The important thing is that you relax and let the stories flow. Don’t wait until next year or when everyone is available or any other “better time”—trust me when I say: Now is always the right time!
Crouch family Thanksgiving, 1940, Ledyard, Connecticut. Photographs by Jack Delano (Library of Congress).
Personal history interview questions: Thanksgiving edition
Use these questions merely as a guide or to give you ideas for questions of your own. The key to any good personal history interview is listening—so ask follow-up questions that genuinely interest you, and let the stories take their own paths...that is usually when the magic ensues!
FOOD
Is there a dish you always associate with Thanksgiving? Do you know who has the recipe, and who originally cooked it for your family?
Did your parents make you eat anything you absolutely hated?
What food(s) do you associate with comfort? With the onset of the school year?
Who made the cakes for birthdays in your home?
Do you recall any massive failures at cooking—a horrible dinner, burnt pie, missing ingredients?
Who taught you how to cook?
TRADITION
What traditions do you most fondly recall from your childhood?
Are there certain traditions that have persisted for generations in your family?
What traditions have you begun anew with your own nuclear family?
Is there a memorable gift you have given someone?
What is the best gift you have ever received?
LAUGHS
Was there ever a moment where you laughed uncontrollably?
Whose laughter do you find heartwarmingly contagious?
Who in the family tells the best jokes?
LESSONS
Do you recall a time you failed in a big way? Can you share the story of how you felt, who comforted you, what you learned? Did that failure hinder you from taking chances in the future, or embolden you in any way?
Do you remember lessons your grandparents taught you?
How were you punished as a child?
Is there a fear you have that you have never been able to overcome?
LOVE
Who was your first love?
Do you remember the first time you said “I love you” to someone who was not part of your family?
How would you describe the love you received from your parents?
Was your grandparents’ or great-grandparents’ love different in any way from that of your parents’?
FANDOM
What teams do you root for?
Did you ever tailgate at a football game?
Did you play sports growing up? Were you a team captain?
Do you remember any big wins? Any big losses?
Are/were there any big rivalries among family members and team loyalties?
HOME
What do you remember most about your childhood home?
Where did you do your homework when you were a kid?
Did you have a secret hiding place in your home?
Did you ever move from one home to another? What was that like?
Was there another place you considered a “home away from home”?
Were there any comforts from your childhood that you translated into all your adult homes?
Did you play outside after school? What was it like being a kid in your neighborhood?
SCHOOL
Did you have a favorite teacher as a kid?
What were your favorite years in school? Why?
What did it say about you in your high school yearbook?
Did you have a childhood dream about what you wanted to do with your life? Do you ever think about it now?
Do you remember drills during school (depending upon age of interviewee, could refer to duck and cover drills during war, fire drills, etc.)
What subjects were you good at? Which ones were more challenging for you?
What kind of grades did you get?
Did you belong to any clubs? Go to dances?
What were some challenges from your school years, particularly ones that made you a stronger or more compassionate person?
Describe your family legacy with regard to education—who was the first to go to college; have any of you attended the same schools; etc.
Free Thanksgiving Questions Guide
Download all 55 questions in a handy printable booklet!
Explore related posts:
This blog was originally posted on November 18, 2018.
Dawn Roode’s curated roundup for the week of Sept. 23, 2026, is overflowing with recent reads on memoir, life story writing, and family history preservation.